VP hopeful Tim Walz lied about ‘white guy’ tacos. 

OK Wilson, this is beyond the pale. Kamala Harris' running mate, Minnesota Gov. Tim Walz, says he eats “white guy” tacos. What? How racist can you get. Republicans and MAGA influencers aren't taking it. They get accused of being racist all the time, since they regularly use racial dog whistles. Did you know Kamala is a DEI hire? Bla, bla, bla.

But that's nothing compared to Walz' “white guy taco” quip that “falsely plays to every stereotype of whiteness,” according to one MAGA influencer. “This isn’t cute,” said Fox News columnist David Marcus. “Walz is being used as a clown to mock white people. If Walz doesn’t like spicy food that’s fine, but it has nothing to do with being a white guy.”

Yeah, he and the Dems are making white people out to be ... well, white people who eat bland food. Outrageous, total bigotry.

According to Walz, white guy tacos “are pretty much ground beef and cheese.” And he claims he doesn't even use taco sauce. Can you believe it, Wilson, no taco sauce? Well, he's a stinkin' liar, says MAGA mainstay Mike Cernovich, who did some sleuthing and found that Walz once made a taco recipe with spices including paprika and chili powder.

Paprika and chili powder! How in the hell can you trust a guy who lies about tacos? White guy tacos, at that. Give us a break.

Top 10 Takeaways From ‘Project 2025’
It's no secret that a 900-page document created by former Trump administration officials at The Heritage Foundation, called “The 2025 Project,” is a blueprint for the next Trump regime. Here are the highlights:

10. Future federal employees must wear red MAGA hats
9. No public schools will go higher than 7th grade and no free lunches for poor kids
8. Top secret documents in Mar-a-Lago bathrooms will be declassified
7. LGBTQ Americans must get “QUEER” tattooed to their foreheads
6. Abortion pills will become illegal, Schedule II controlled substances
5. Illegal immigrants will be forced to build a “big, wonderful” wall on the border
4. Possession of pornography will be punishable by selective surgery
3. China will be removed from all U.S. government maps
2. FBI agents will become butlers and gardeners at the White House and Mar-A-Lago
1. And Don Jr. will be next in line for the title of el presidente-for-life.

Is it Fair to Sentence Trump Before the Election?
Donald J. Trump is scheduled to be sentenced on Sept. 18 in New York on 34 felony counts of falsifying business records. But is it fair to sentence a convicted felon right before an election? It could give voters a bad impression of the Republican nominee.

According to polling, some 97% of Trump supporters don't care about the convictions. After all, they were bogus charges brought by a bogus district attorney in a bogus court with a bogus judge. But if Judge Juan Merchan were to sentence Trump to jail time, that could change things.

Trump supporters might think, “Jeez, he's in the slammer with despicable badasses. That's not cool.” Or what if the judge sentences Trump to community service, where he has to wear an orange jumpsuit and pick up garbage along the L.I.E. (Long Island Expressway)?

There he'd be with one of those poking sticks and a big garbage bag walking along picking up refuse and swatting at flies. That could be worse than jail time as far as the election goes. It's just hard to un-see Trump in an orange jumpsuit, waddling along the expressway with people honking and waving.

They might even roll down their windows and yell, “Make America Great Again.” That's just cruel and unusual punishment.

Postscript—Alright sports fans, that's a wrap for another exciting week here at Smart Bomb, where we keep track of what politicians eat so you don't have to. Wilson, did you know that Kamala Harris eats Doritos—and nacho cheese-flavored Doritos at that? And you thought white guy tacos were outrageous.

Sean Hannity and Elisabeth Hasselbeck of Fox News fame are truly perplexed. “That’s the commander-in-chief, potentially,” Hasselbeck warned, “that’s the emotional response of the leader of the free world—binge-eat a bag of Doritos?” No Wilson, we won't remind her of the former commander-in-chief throwing McDonald's cheeseburgers on the wall of the Oval Office. Makes you long for the good ol' days when Gerald Ford made his own toast every morning. Simpler times, indeed.

Speaking of white guy tacos (clever segue), House Oversight Chairman Rep. James Comer (R-Ky.) will open an investigation into Tim Walz regarding his links to China. We are told this has nothing to do with white guy egg foo young or white guy chop suey. However, on various visits to China, Walz reportedly imbibed in Kung Pao chicken and sweet & sour pork. “Americans deserve to fully understand how deep Governor Walz’s relationship with Chinese food goes,” said Comer. After all, you are what you eat.

These are testy times for poor Donald Trump: he's going to get sentenced in the New York fraud case; there will soon be an evidentiary hearing in D.C. surrounding the Jan. 6 insurrection debacle. If that weren't enough, he's slipping in the poles to a black woman. Wilson, you and guys in the band must have something to ease Donald's pain. Go for it:

Quicksand closing in around my eyes
Quicksand forcing me to realize
Nothing that I see
Can get through this wall to me

From the things I feel
All that it can steal
Taken and concealed
Not to be revealed
About quicksand
Talking about quicksand
“Quicksand”—The Youngbloods