Mistaken Identity 

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Mistaken Identity
Christie Louise Jones, 49, of Richfield, North Carolina, was likely looking for revenge on a former boyfriend on July 22. Instead, she got charged with arson and other crimes, the Salisbury Post reported. On that day, at a house in Gold Hill, a woman called the Rowan County Sheriff's Office to say a woman unknown to her was outside her home, trying to set it on fire. The arson attempt started with a pile of burning wood on the front porch; while trying to reach the hose, the homeowner realized his propane tank was also on fire, and his hose had been blocked with sealant to make it inoperable. That's when he noticed a car parked across his driveway and a woman standing beside it. When he approached her, he said, "She looked at me like she didn't know who I was"—and she didn't. She drove away but was later apprehended; deputies said her ex-boyfriend owns property in the area. Just not that property.

Wait, What?
Something went terribly wrong on July 15 at a 7-Eleven store in Waikiki, Hawaii, the Associated Press reported. Emergency responders were called to the store just after midnight, where they found a 40-year-old man suffering "multiple lacerations, puncture wounds and a severed hand," Shayne Enright of EMS services said. When police tried to question the employees, they said no one was there who had been working at the time of the incident. But tourist Michael Suissa from Switzerland said he witnessed the assault. Suissa said the assailant had a sword and identified him as a worker he had interacted with over the previous several days. A 46-year-old man was arrested, but it was not clear whether he was employed at the 7-Eleven.

Bad Sport
At the Moscow Open chess tournament on July 19, a chess-playing robot apparently became unsettled by a 7-year-old player's quick move in the game, so it grabbed the child's hand and snapped one of his fingers, the Guardian reported. "The robot broke the child's finger," said Sergey Lazarev, president of the Moscow Chess Federation. "This is of course bad." Ya think? Another official explained: "There are certain safety rules and the child, apparently, violated them. When he made his move, he did not realize he first had to wait." The player, Christopher, returned to the tournament the next day. His parents have contacted the public prosecutor's office.

That's One Way to Do It
• On July 25, the Curry County (Oregon) Sheriff's Office received a call from the U.S. Forest Service about fires burning in the county, CNN reported. An employee of the Bureau of Land Management had reportedly seen a man walking along a gravel road, starting fires. As crews on the ground got the blazes under control, three area residents spotted 30-year-old Trennon Smith walking near the fires, Sheriff John Ward said. "It was reported that the suspect became very combative with the three residents and had to be tied to a tree to subdue him," Ward added. Ward said Smith had allegedly set the fires in a manner that would block residents from escaping. He was charged with first-degree arson, second-degree arson and reckless burning.

• Dean Mayhew 30, of Sussex, England, has a bad habit of forgetting his Tesco loyalty card when he goes grocery shopping, the Daily Record reported. The scaffolder and father of seven said he visits the store up to three times a day, so the savings really add up if he can get the discounts. So Mayhew got the QR code from his card tattooed on his forearm—and it works perfectly. "Sometimes I'm not the cleverest of guys but (people have) said that for me, it's pretty genius," Mayhew said. "Every time I go in there, they're shocked. I could use the one on my phone but I want to use the one on my arm as it's funny."

Marketing Ploy?
Citing confusingly contradictory reasons, Klondike announced on July 26 that it is discontinuing its beloved Choco Taco ice cream treat, the Associated Press reported. The confection, invented in 1983 by a former ice cream truck driver, has rabid fans; Reddit co-founder Alexis Ohanian offered to buy the rights to keep it on the market, but Klondike's parent, Unilever, didn't respond. Later the same day, Klondike tweeted that it was "working hard" to bring the Choco Taco back "in the coming years."

Creme de la Weird
Catarina Orduna Perez, of Misantla, Mexico, had "a particular affinity for penises," Vice reported, so when she passed at age 99, her family fulfilled her dying wish: a giant phallic statue atop her grave. Her family unveiled the monument—all 5 1/2 feet tall and 600 pounds of it—on July 23, honoring her approach to life and her belief that her family are "vergas"—a Mexican slang word that means "penis" but can also connote "integrity, courage, passion," said her grandson, Alvaro Mota Limon. The monument took 12 people a month to construct, and reaction from locals has been mixed. "Of every 10 people, I think that around seven see (it) positively," Mota Limon said.

Recent Alarming Headline
A 73-year-old woman fishing with friends off a boat along the Florida coast on July 19 caught the wrong end of a 100-pound sailfish when it leapt out of the water, The Washington Post reported. Katherine Perkins, from Arnold, Maryland, was stabbed in her groin area by the fish's pointed bill as her companions tried to reel it in. The boat returned to shore and Perkins was airlifted to a hospital.

On a Mission
On July 22, Corey Johnson, 29, of Ocala, Florida, attempted to enter the Patrick Space Force Base in Brevard County with a special message from President Joe Biden: Johnson claimed Biden had told him to steal a 2013 Ford F150 from Riviera Beach, then drive it to the base to let them know that U.S. aliens were fighting Chinese dragons. Fox35 Orlando reported that Johnson was apprehended outside the base and charged with grand theft of a motor vehicle.

Ewwwww
A steward on a SunExpress flight from Ankara, Turkey, to Dusseldorf, Germany, discovered a disturbing addition to an in-flight meal on July 21: a severed snake's head nestled among the spinach. The steward took a video, Metro News reported, but SunExpress took offense: "The allegations and shares in the press regarding in-flight food service are absolutely unacceptable and a detailed investigation has been initiated on the subject," a statement read. The airline's meals are provided by Sancak Inflight Services, which alleged the snake head was added to the meal after they prepared it. Ssssssssssssssssuspicious.

Inexplicable
On July 21, the Fort Gerhard military museum in Swinoujscie, Poland, took to Facebook to beg its patrons to refrain from having sex in the "dark corners" of the museum, the Daily Mail reported. New security cameras had revealed numerous visitors engaging in "the art of love," the museum posted. Director Piotr Piwowarczyk admitted that "in less than a month, we have already had three recordings of lovers engaged in trysts." He noted that museum-goers may have different "temperaments, some of them very conservative. We don't want them to be shocked during their visit by stumbling across a couple engaged in lustful antics."

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