Creme de la Weird 

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Creme de la Weird
Stick with me here. In 1899 in Peshawar, Pakistan, James Squid, a drunken British officer, arrested a ... tree because he thought it was a fugitive trying to get away from him. He ordered the tree chained to the ground, Oddity Central reported, and the chains have remained for 125 years, along with a plaque explaining them. While tourists are tickled by the strange restraints, locals see the chains as a symbol of British oppression. "Through this act, the British basically implied to the tribesmen that if they dared act against the Raj, they too would be punished in a similar fashion," one local man said. Others call it a living history.

Our Litigious Society
• Cynthia Kelly, 18, of Hillsborough County, Florida, has sued The Hershey Co. for $5 million because the Reese's Peanut Butter Pumpkins she bought in October didn't have a jack-o'-lantern face on them as shown on the packaging. ClickOrlando reported on Dec. 29 that Kelly accused the company of "false and deceptive advertising," and she "would not have purchased the Reese's Peanut Butter Pumpkins product if she knew that it did not have the detailed carvings of the mouth and/or eyes as pictured on the product label," the suit reads. She also pointed out that the White Ghost and Football candies were missing their own key details. One reviewer called the pumpkin a "monstrosity."

• Two years ago, Paul Kerouac stopped at a Dunkin' Donuts in Winter Park, Florida, where he used the restroom, the New York Post reported. While he was indisposed, the toilet he was occupying exploded, leaving him "covered with debris, including human feces and urine," according to a lawsuit filed on Jan. 3 in Florida's 9th Judicial District. Kerouac claims the Dunkin' workers knew there was a "problem with the toilet" and says he now "requires mental health care and counseling as a direct result of the trauma he experienced in the restroom."

Recurring Theme
• Authorities are still fishing for a man who entered a Bass Pro Shops store in Fort Myers, Florida, on Dec. 20 and dipped a net into the indoor fishpond, capturing a 50-pound tarpon. USA Today reported that the suspect left the store with the dripping catch, and despite a cash reward and social media posts, the Lee County Sheriff's Office has not been able to identify or find him.

• Authorities were called to the Leeds, Alabama, Bass Pro Shops on Jan. 4 after 42-year-old George Owens of Sterrett drove a car into a pole in the parking lot, then exited the car, stripped off all his clothes and ran inside, where he did a cannonball into the aquarium. AL.com reported that Owens yelled at two police officers, then climbed over the edge of the aquarium, where he fell to the concrete floor and knocked himself out. He was charged with public lewdness among other offenses.

Super Freak
On Dec. 13, as a family in Arlington, Virginia, sat down to dinner, a Ring doorbell notification alerted them to someone at the door, WUSA-TV reported. The woman told her husband, "There's this guy, he didn't ring the doorbell. He's just standing there and he's in a gingerbread man costume." The husband called the police non-emergency line to report the creepy visit, and about an hour later, another neighbor, Lindsey Churchill, spotted the gingerbread man. "All of a sudden my dogs were going crazy ... and there was a giant blow-up gingerbread man costume out on the sidewalk," she said. "We kind of locked eyes and the gingerbread man went on his way. It was not holly jolly." Police never actually caught up with the subject, who was not identified.

Getting Away From It All
• Three armed suspects were busy robbing a check-cashing business in Commerce City, Colorado, on Dec. 16 when another thief mucked up their getaway plans, 9News-TV reported. The robbers' vehicle, which was probably stolen, was outside when a woman jumped in and took off with it, leaving the teenage suspects to try to escape on foot. Police were able to capture two of them, along with loaded firearms, and arrest them. The car thief is still at large.

• In Wheat Ridge, Colorado, police caught up with a burglar on Dec. 28 who had hired an Uber for use as a getaway car, 14News-TV reported. Jose Guadalupe Perez-Gallardo was taken into custody as he approached his hired ride, carrying a backpack with $8,600 worth of stolen Milwaukee-brand tools inside. "Ordering an Uber as your getaway driver makes it that much easier for us to find you," the Wheat Ridge Police Department posted online.

Questionable Judgment
Dr. Kevin Molldrem of Eden Prairie, Minnesota, is the subject of a malpractice lawsuit filed in late December by his patient Kathleen Wilson, USA Today reported. Wilson alleges in the suit that Molldrem, during a single visit in July 2020, performed more than 30 procedures on Wilson's mouth—eight crowns, four root canals and 20 fillings—and that the work was done "improperly," resulting in her disfiguration. The lawsuit also alleges that Molldrem used twice the amount of anesthesia allowed and then falsified records to cover that dosage. Wilson is seeking more than $50,000 in damages.

Not on My Watch
Vancouver, British Columbia, police revealed that on Dec. 19, a 72-year-old woman successfully chased an intruder from her home with a shovel, Vancouver City News reported. A naked man broke into the victim's home with a pointed metal rod, which he swung toward her throughout the encounter. She fought back with a shovel, and "chased him out of the house and cornered him until officers arrived," police said. "Kudos to her, it was pretty badass of her, I would say," said Constable Tania Visintin. No one was injured during the incident.

News You Can Use
We've all seen the restaurant notices about automatic gratuities added for parties of more than six or eight people. A 10-person group in South Bend, Indiana, thought they would beat the system at the Wild Crab restaurant by splitting into two groups of five, WSBT-TV reported. A manager said the group was informed that they'd be subject to the 18% gratuity, even though they were seated in different sections of the restaurant. As the party left the restaurant, someone threw crayons at the manager and pepper-sprayed them. Firefighters responded to help the victim of the pepper spray, and a police report was filed.

Oops
Someone missed the "Please secure all loose clothing" safety message. On Jan. 5, on the DC Rivals HyperCoaster at Movie World in Oxenford, Australia, the Mirror reported that a scarf became entangled around the wheel of one of the trains, which caused it to stop at the top of a hill. Dozens of riders were stranded, and each was given a harness and told to walk down the stairs to the load station. "All the guests on-board are safe with the ride vehicle stopped in a designated zone," Warner Bros. Movie World said in a statement.

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