Jeff Reese: The “I Hate Winter; I’m Glad It’s Spring” Parade.
Ben Rosch: We should start a parade for the ever forgotten/overlooked Flag Day. June 14 is such a great day, why not celebrate with a parade and maybe some drinks?
Brandon Burt: My friend Chuck and I think it would be fun to institute holidays celebrating random, bizarre things. How about “Peacock Days”? Everybody loves peacocks.
Doug Kruithof: It’s gotta be for Fat Tuesday—best holiday in the world—we stole the Jazz away from New Orleans—now let’s get their best holiday!
Stephen Matney: A funeral procession for the liquorious sidecar.
Emily Prachthauser: The Utah Veg Parade! Vegetarians and vegans coming together to keep the public informed about animal cruelty, environmental issues and health issues related to animal products. Oh, and we’ll dance around in cute animal costumes. Fun for the kids.
Bryan Bale: How about a “Hope for the Human Race” parade? I’d start by celebrating people like Denise Cerreta, founder of One World Cafe [“Another World,” July 7, 2005, City Weekly] and the One World Everybody Eats Foundation.
Nathan Levinson: “Penises on Parade.” Long live the phallus! Truly, I just want neck-wrenching floats that’ll loosen this town up a bit.
Suzie Broshous: I would have a parade in honor of hot men. I would be carried on a throne with thousands and thousands of spankin’ hot men taking care of my every need.
Valeri Tronier: I’d like to see a dance parade to kick off an all-night dance party followed by an after-party with dancing in the hotel lobby, right around 3 a.m. we’d have to clear the lobby, so we could take it to the room and dance there, too.
Paula Saltas: John must have written about our first “Bay to Breakers” experience! Well, then—how about a “Come Dressed as a Chelada” parade?
Susan Kruithof: Atheism. Clearly, it needs a boost. I just read that statistically speaking, 62 percent of the American population would never vote for an atheist. Jesus!
Nick Clark: The “Thank You, Texas, for Taking the Focus on Polygamy Your Way” parade. Wear jeans under your summer dresses, girls!
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