Rep. Trevor Lee’s next target—SLC’s Harvey Milk Boulevard and “Satanic Pride.” 

Time to erase all signs of Satan, including the street signs on 900 South in Salt Lake City imprinted with: “Harvey Milk Blvd.” We know the late Harvey Milk was in league with Satan, because a Republican from Layton, Rep. Trevor Lee, told us so.

Well shucks, isn't it nice that good old Trevor Lee would take time out of his busy life, way up there in Davis County—where his avocation is scaring the daylights out of them evil LGBTQ people—to come down to Salt Lake City and erase any notion of a gay icon?

It seems Trevor got this brainstorm from Secretary of State Pete Hegseth, who ordered that “Harvey Milk” be stricken from the USNS Harvey Milk, a replenishment ship that supports other U.S. Navy ships. Milk served in the U.S. Navy during the Korean War on the USS Kittiwake, a submarine rescue ship. He was elected to the San Francisco Board of Supervisors in 1977, the first openly gay elected official in California.

Milk was killed a year later, along with San Francisco Mayor George Moscone, by Dan White, who quit his city supervisor position in a beef over Milk's proposal to ban discrimination based on sexual orientation. Now, Trevor Lee is setting things right: “Utahns don’t want streets named after pedophiles.”

Earlier, Lee labeled Pride Month as Satanic and championed legislation that banned Pride flags from government buildings. Isn't it great that we still have lawmakers willing to legislate morality—their morality—or whatever it is?

Top 10 Ways Mike Lee Tries to Be Like Trump
10. Wears long red ties that he frequently trips on.
9. Throws Big Macs at the wall when he gets upset.
8. Often lies about previous lies.
7. Likes to post on X that Democrats are sicko Marxists.
6. Scratches his butt in public.
5. Thinks America Can Be Great Again by giving tax breaks to the ultra rich.
4. Posts all kinds of weird crazy stuff to increase his online followers.
3. Thinks he's brilliant and wants to be an “influencer.”
2. Posts jokes about people who were murdered in cold blood.
1. Like Trump, he loves to pour accolades on the president—who pours accolades on himself.

What to Do When a Man Comes With an Assault Rifle
Well heck, Wilson, what would you do if someone came around with an AR-15 assault rifle—the weapon that was designed to kill a lot of people fast? Mass shootings are no anomaly in the United States. In 2024 alone, 711 people were killed and 2,375 wounded in 586 mass shootings (defined as when four or more people are injured or killed), according to the non-profit research group Gun Violence Archive.

So here comes this dude with an assault rifle. He could kill everyone around in a couple of minutes. But in Utah—an open carry state—it's perfectly legal to carry around an assault rifle or handgun like the guy at the “No Kings” march in downtown Salt Lake City.

Second Amendment proponents say freedom grows out of the barrel of a gun. Translation: If we want to be free, we should all carry guns.

You’re right, Wilson, that's totally absurd pretzel logic. Making things worse is that almost every crackpot, weirdo, stupid kid or angry adult can buy any kind of firearm, anytime. Wilson, you and the guys in the band could go to the gun store and become a militia in no time flat. That's because the powerful gun lobby, including the National Rifle Association (NRA), gives greenbacks and heat—the carrot and the stick—to weak-willed legislators who want to keep them happy.

So here's this dude in a crowd with an assault rifle: Is he a mass killer or just a stupid punk? What do you do, wait for him to start shooting?

Postscript—That's a wrap for another bizarre week here at Smart Bomb, where we keep track of the 400-pound gorillas in the room so you don't have to. Well Wilson, we've got a lot of gorillas to keep track of—where to start. Maybe to keep our sanity, we shouldn't enumerate all those hairy beasts hanging about.

It's downright depressing—just when you think things can't possibly get any worse, they get worse. We're not blaming anybody (Donald Trump), but if the gold sneakers fit ...

You know, Wilson, that's a good idea—let's look around for some good news:

—“I Wasn't Going Home Without Him”: Man Dives Into Pond To Save Dog From Alligator
—Police Officer Smashes Way Into Burning Car To Rescue 68-Year-Old Woman
—Teen Returns Lost Wallet Gets Dream E-Bike From Grateful Stranger
—Blind Mother Of Five Graduates From Tennessee Tech With Honors
—A Stranger Performed CPR For 20 Minutes And Saved A Montreal Man's Life
—Five-Year-Old Boy Draws 99 Animals For Sir David Attenborough's 99th Birthday

Well, what do you know, there is some good news after all. You're right Wilson, it would be cool if we could at least get some good news with our steady diet of horror. Or, what if we got 50% good news along with 50% bad news. Then, at least we'd feel half good.

Well shucks Wilson, you and the guys in the band must have at least one uplifting number to go along with the good news. Well we know, it can be a challenge finding an uplifting song but we know you've got one somewhere—so hit it Wilson:

Sun's up ... looks okay
The world survives into another day
And I'm thinking 'bout eternity
Some kinda ecstasy got a hold on me

And I'm wondering where the lions are
I'm wondering where the lions are
I'm wondering where the lions are
Wondering where the lions are
“Wondering Where The Lions Are”—Bruce Cockburn