Master Plan: No Beer | News | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly

Master Plan: No Beer 

Pin It
Favorite

In heaven there is no beer, that’s why we drink it here.

Not so fast, there, mister. Mitt Romney, the high guru of all things Olympic as they pertain to Zion, says there will be no beer at the medals plaza near the Delta Center during the 2002 Winter Games.


Now it just so happens that the area where the medal plaza will be is owned by the LDS church. And it just so happens that the Mittster is LDS. And it just so happens that the LDS church frowns on beer drinking. It also just so happens that the parking lot where the medal plaza will be February 2002 has a great view of the LDS Temple.


So, is it any surprise Romney would ban beer from the plaza, described by some as the premier party site of the Olympics?


Well, apparently it took Salt Lake City Mayor Rocky Anderson by surprise. The Rock wants beer on the plaza. After watching the championship beer drinking habits of Aussies in Sydney at the Summer Games, the mayor says beer is a must for a good time. Here at Smartbomb,® we just can’t argue with that. Visitors from other countries ought to have the option of beer at the medals plaza, Rocky says.


The question is, is this a battle the mayor can win? And win or lose, will he waste a lot of political capital on what appears to be a lose-lose position? Sure, it would be nice for visitors to get beer on the plaza. But locals won’t be there and if they are, they know how to get a drink if they want one. There are no votes in this for Rocky, only a downside. Chug-a-lug.


Beyond that, Rocky obviously doesn’t recognize that this Olympics isn’t about visitors. It’s about providing good TV images of Salt Lake City and Utah around the globe—particularly those areas where LDS missionaries are present. And how would it look for athletes to be receiving medals against the lighted backdrop of the LDS Temple with beer-guzzling loudmouths having a party? It’s just not part of the master plan, folks.


Hey, speaking of the Olympics, the Salt Lake (Olympic) Organizing Committee has spent three-quarters of a million dollars—that’s right, $750,000—for the legal defense of Tom Welch and Dave Johnson, those fallen Olympic heroes who helped us bribe our way to hosting the 2002 Winter Games.


The trial for the pair, who were indicted on 15 felony counts, is still quite a ways off and could drag on right up until the Games. The lawyer bills are bound to go up, up and up, and will be topping $1 million soon. Rumor has it that SLOC is shopping for an official sponsor to underwrite the legal fees. Imagine Olympic TV spots that go something like this: “Walter DeVries and Associates, the Official Olympic Scandal Defense. When you need us, we’ll be there.”

Pin It
Favorite

More by Christopher Smart

  • Locked & Loaded

    Inmate deaths plague Salt Lake County jail.
    • Nov 7, 2018
  • Flying Dinosaur Days: Christopher Smart (Editor 1996-2002)

    It’s all a fog now, but as I review the fossil record—with carbon-14 dating, of course—it appears that I started at City Weekly sometime in 1993 as a freelancer ...
    • Jun 23, 2010
  • Audit Says Police Chief Should Bury the Hatchet With Officers

    A management audit of the Salt Lake City Police Department is apparently unable to square poor morale among police officers with findings that Chief Ruben Ortega’s department is making progress and is relatively well run. But the yet-to-become-public...
    • Sep 6, 2007
  • More »

Latest in News

  • Voting App Blues

    Concerns about election technology are making Utah reevaluate app usage.
    • Feb 19, 2020
  • Shine On

    Following a mayoral run bust, minority whip Luz Escamilla eyes what's next.
    • Feb 5, 2020
  • Charter Candidates

    Utah's Republican candidates for governor go rah-rah for the state's public charter schools.
    • Jan 29, 2020
  • More »

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Readers also liked…

  • Vexed Vet

    Desperate and facing homelessness, one vet seeks answers from local social service agency.
    • Jul 25, 2018
  • Breaking Chains, Building Links

    Orem's Colonial Heritage Festival expands understanding of whose history is worth knowing.
    • Jul 11, 2018

© 2020 Salt Lake City Weekly

Website powered by Foundation