8. The disappearance of the Saturday-morning cartoon block.
7. Mr. Mac's insistence that Herbert is no longer eligible for the "Missionary Package" discount.
6. Also, that the term "Missionary Package" now sounds like a gay thing.
5. The back-to-back cancellations of the Nickelback tour and the Hello Kitty festival.
4. Super Big Gulps are now 40 ounces, not 44: "What's 'Super' about that?!"
3. The Mitt Romney meme "Why don't poor people just buy more money?" wasn't real; plausible.
2. Just narrowly missing his dream of living out the classic Pauly Shore movie Jury Duty.
1. Acme Toupee Co. no longer makes his favorite model, "The Rugged Gentleman."