FLASHBACK 1989: Social worker Debra Daniels teaches empowerment to victims of domestic abuse. | City Weekly REWIND | Salt Lake City Weekly

FLASHBACK 1989: Social worker Debra Daniels teaches empowerment to victims of domestic abuse. 

A Better Way for Battered Women

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In commemoration of City Weekly's 40th anniversary, we are digging into our archives to celebrate. Each week, we FLASHBACK to a story or column from our past in honor of four decades of local alt-journalism. Whether the names and issues are familiar or new, we are grateful to have this unique newspaper to contain them all.

Title: A Better Way for Battered Women
Author: John Saltas
Date: Dec. 15, 1989

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Debra Daniels sits at her desk in a small, deprived office buried deep within the catacombs of the YWCA Building at 322 East 300 South. Family pictures on the wall help, and a few other accouterments add color. You won't find a whole lot of color outside of here—even the donated Christmas trees are spare. No fax here, no modem. No skylight and no carpet. No push-one-button-and-here's-your-coffee-and-donuts, ma'am, new-fangled piece of office Americana, thank you very much. No starry-eyed emulators of Bakker or Millikin walk the halls. No P.T. Barnum hype. Just the real thing.

Today, the "real thing" is a discussion on battered women, and women who have no idea in Hell on how to be self-sufficient. When a battered woman—emotionally or physically—shows up at the YWCA, Debra Daniels goes to work for her. Debra must communicate positive in this barren building. Listen to her and you quickly learn what she knows. Debra is a woman of these times. What Debra teaches is empowerment.

"The women who come through here are brave, courageous women," says Debra, an Ogden native who holds a Social Work degree from Utah State and a Masters of Social Work from the University of Utah. "The struggle to seek help is very difficult. Here they can get a taste of empowerment and it tastes good."

Empowerment is the notion—some men quite obviously believe otherwise—that a woman can achieve self-authority, that she has the power within herself to make her own life-choices. The trail that leads to a woman losing her empowerment is a long and winding one, but too often the common denominator is domestic violence.

Husband-gets-drunk-beats-wife, is the cliche, but by no stretch is the drunk abuser the only abuser. Domestic, physical abuse is wildly out-of-hand, but so is sexual abuse, emotional and psychological abuse, and verbal abuse. A man who threatens to kill his wife's pets and constantly sharpens knives in her presence is as abusive as a man who reels back his right hook and lets fly.

A social worker of the first order ("committed since day one"), Debra is quick to point out that, although alcohol is the number one factor in male and female domestic violence, "it is not the cause, but only a symptom. Even if the abuser stops drinking, the abuse doesn't stop if a person is predisposed to act violently." A sad example of such, Debra has seen many times: An abusive spouse quits drinking and acting violently, but then increases the verbal abuse which can be just as tough and mean.

"I've had women here who wished their spouses would start drinking again," Debra says. "Why? Because then they would get drunk and pass out and the abuse would be over."

And the old tale that, well, she asked for it, doesn't hold one bit of credibility as far as Debra Daniels is concerned. To her, violence is violence and no amount of reason is sufficient for one human being to lay hand on another.

click to enlarge Debra Daniels - STEVE MIDGLEY
  • Steve Midgley
  • Debra Daniels

"A woman has the right not to live in a violent situation," she asserts. "In the name of the law is no reason to abuse." What she means is that if a man beats his wife in a domestic argument, it will be treated as a civil offense, but if the same amount of violence were to unfold on a city street, it would be handled as an attempted murder. Debra supports new legislation that will allow for a Pro-Arrest Policy allowing police officers to arrest, or cite, persons involved in domestic violence if there is a possibility of probable cause. Too often police arrive at a domestic violence scene only to have one spouse or the other just say "it was nothing" while sporting black eyes and rolling their teeth "across the floor like Chicklets."

A woman who finally has had enough—and wants to keep her Chicklets—has few good choices. Thanks to heavy guilt and a lack of good information on where to turn, she often returns to an undesirable situation. And don't think for a second that the choice is an easy one.

The YWCA is a catch-net for those who can take no more. Debra oversees two YWCA programs: the Residential, Self-Sufficiency program, and the Women in Jeopardy program.

In the self-sufficiency program, a woman can find individual counseling and guidance, and group education. The fee ranges between $160 and $360 monthly for YWCA services and includes room, board, recreation and all other YWCA amenities. Counselors will also direct women who need them to legal, housing, employment, medical and social services.

"The self-sufficiency program is for women in need. Women with children have other state and social services available to them," says Debra.

There are currently 14 women in the YWCA Residential Self-Sufficiency program (capacity is 23) and each is learning self-sufficient goals while working on those goals. A typical woman in that program is anything but. She may have been recently released (and successfully treated) at a drug or alcohol treatment center (Western Institute, House of Hope, etc.) or perhaps from similar treatment in an adult psychiatric program.

She may be dealing with an emotional upheaval—something so simple as a change in residence and lifestyle for instance—or she may have been recently widowed. So too, she may want out of an abusive relationship.

In Utah, one out of every ten women—25% of whom are pregnant—are assaulted by intimate male partners and 144,075 children—50% of whom will also be assaulted—will witness those assaults. Sadly, only 15% of all domestic assaults come to the attention of law enforcement. Of all the abused women in Utah, only 12% who report their assaults will ever enter shelters. The YWCA sees but a fraction of a fraction; still, Debra Daniels does not give in.

"We teach them that they are women. That they have rights, and that to hit someone is a crime. No matter how much a person was provocated, he does not have the right to abuse," she says.

Women who realize that they are in a lose/lose relationship may end up in the YWCA Women in Jeopardy program (capacity 50; 24 current residents). Differing from the self-sufficiency program in a number of ways—a woman can stay in this program for only 30 calendar days in one year; all services are free; children are allowed, to name a few—the Women in Jeopardy program is designed to give individual direction and counsel to women who want to break away from their violent relationships.

State coffers pitch-in via social worker counseling from the State Division of Family Services, and women may also get guidance on how to build healthier relationships from the Community Counseling Center. Support groups, where women in similar situations discuss their needs, are provided.

"If a woman is serious, two-and-a-half weeks is adequate," says Debra of the time it takes to get a woman back on her feet again.

The importance of such a program is intensified by a particularly telling statistic: approximately 65% of all children growing up in abusive homes will enter into abusive adult relationships. In Utah, our generation has produced 95,650 victims; without treatment, they will produce 234,120 more victims.

But, there's hope in the form of people like Debra Daniels, herself preparing the world to be a better place for her own son, three-and-a-half year old David—one handsome kid!

"This is by far the most fulfilling position I've ever held. I can see changes in people here daily, seeing them learn small tasks makes a difference.

"We let them know we're okay and that they are special."

So too, is Debra Daniels.


How You Can Help
Room 122 is typical of the 23 Residential Self-Sufficiency rooms at the YWCA: linoleum floor and sink top, a bed stand and night light, a mirror, a small desk, and a small closet. Ancient drapes do not conceal the winter winds. Like all rooms in the wing, a small plaque on the door signifies the individual, group, or agency that originally donated furnishings to Room 122. Like the others, the date is over 30 years old. The YWCA could use your good will and Christmas Spirit.
"ADOPT A ROOM"
Rooms like 122 need towels, single-bed covers, and washcloths. Also needed are personal-care items, sample size packets of soap and shampoo, tooth brushes, and other items. Children's coats are especially welcome this winter. You can also re-fit a complete room. If you can, do it!!
Call 355-2804 for details
YWCA 322 East 300 South

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About The Author

John Saltas

John Saltas

Bio:
John Saltas, Utah native and journalism/mass communication graduate from the University of Utah, founded City Weekly as a small newsletter in 1984. He served as the newspaper's first editor and publisher and now, as founder and executive editor, he contributes a column under the banner of Private Eye, (the original... more

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