Eight Utah Budget Proposals | The Ocho | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly

Eight Utah Budget Proposals 

Pin It
Favorite
art7373widea.jpg

Eight budget proposals to help offset Utah’s $320 million deficit:

8. Public libraries to reduce inventory to People and the works of Ayn Rand.

7. Potholes to be filled with materials from the state´s recycling program. And cats.

6. School weeks to be cut from five days to “whatever you can swing; it’s cool.”

5. State mental patients to be released and employed by “going out of business” sandwich-board companies.

4. State prisoners to be released and employed by “going out of business” sandwich-board companies to wrangle wandering mental patients.

3. State Wine Store to charge an on-the-spot corking fee. then an on-the-spot re-corking fee.

2. A whole lotta Google ads on Utah.gov.

1. let “evil” federal stimulus money ride on one “blessed” Blackjack hand in Wendover.

Pin It
Favorite

Speaking of...

More by Bill Frost

  • Available Jones

    Eight great achievements by Utah Gov. Gary Herbert during eight years in office.
    • Nov 29, 2017
  • Get Happy!

    Happy! brings the weirdness to Syfy; Fuller House further erodes 'Merica.
    • Nov 29, 2017
  • Rated Xmas

    Screw Thanksgiving—bring on the Christmas TV!
    • Nov 22, 2017
  • More »

Latest in The Ocho

  • Available Jones

    Eight great achievements by Utah Gov. Gary Herbert during eight years in office.
    • Nov 29, 2017
  • Thanks for Nothin'

    Eight things you just don't want to hear from family this Thanksgiving.
    • Nov 22, 2017
  • Justice League Assemble!

    Eight team members conveniently left out of the new Justice League movie.
    • Nov 15, 2017
  • More »

© 2020 Salt Lake City Weekly

Website powered by Foundation