Coldest Beer & Bar Guide 2012 

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Lumpy’s
38.8°
Lumpy’s is a two-floor sports bar that does everything right. That includes making sure your favorite athletic events are on a multitude of flat-screen TVs and that there’s plenty of other things to do, like poker, “bar” pong (love those loony liquor laws—you know what they mean), darts, pool, karaoke, live music (Thursdays) and dancing with DJs on Fridays and Saturdays. The food is also outstanding—we recommend huge helpings of nachos or the El Jefe appetizer sampler—oh, and the weekend brunch, served until 2 p.m. 3000 S. Highland Drive, Salt Lake City, 801-484-5597

Lumpy’s Downtown
37.4°
If you hate bar hopping, stop by Lumpy’s for the most comprehensive sports-bar experience in the downtown area. The huge, three-floor bar houses a game room basement complete with four pool tables, three foosball tables, and video games—not to mention countless TVs broadcasting about every sports game possible. After the game, head upstairs to the dimly lit social space to mingle with regulars and newcomers alike, or slide into a booth to catch some niche sports action on your own personal TV. Finally, mosey on up to the top floor for dancing to the live DJ. 145 W. Pierpont Ave., Salt Lake City, 801-883-8714, LumpysDowntownSLC.com

The Point After
33.3°
This bar, located in Murray’s Sports Mall, is an uptown find. After (or in place of) a gym workout, there’s no better place to congregate for great drinks, tempting (and even healthy) dishes, patio on two decks and live music Thursday, Friday and Saturday. “We’re the best-kept secret out of downtown,” says manager Doug Marlowe. With 30 HD flat-screens on two floors, The Point After sponsors numerous charity events and charters buses to U of U home games and golf leagues. But beyond sports, there’s a swanky nightclub vibe, where drinking, dining and dancing are the class acts. Food is made fresh; meats, including salad meats, are smoked in-house. You’ll also find Terrence Hansen playing his two-headed guitar here every Thursday. 5445 S. 900 East, Murray, 801-266-9552, PointAfterSLC.com

Scorez Sports Bar
33.2°
On the outside, it may seem like a hole-in-the-wall sports bar, but what sets Scorez apart is not only the cold beer but also the extremely hospitable staff. After a few visits, the bartenders will remember your name and your drink. The patrons and staff are down to earth and willing to chat or just leave you be, depending on your mood. Be sure to add a signed dollar bill to the hundreds of others taped up on the walls. 571 W. State, Lehi, 801-768-9085

Stockman’s Bar
34.6°
What seems to be a little roadside dive is, in fact—for now. Stockman’s is undergoing renovations that will transform it into a giant two-level party place later this summer. Until then, it’s a cozy spot for drinking Laytonites to watch sports, play pool or just get hammered. For the latter purpose, try the signature Vegas Bomb, which features four types of booze and Rockstar—and makes three servings for nine bucks. Post-remodel amenities will include a rooftop bar and live music. 80 N. Main, Layton, 801-544-8102

Summit Lounge
40.8°
Next to Osaka Sushi in Layton is this strip mall-ish sports bar, where you can order an Underbomb featuring locally made spirit Underground and Red Bull. Ka-boom. After that, if it’s Sunday or Thursday, you’ll probably feel like a little karaoke. Wednesdays and Thursdays feature local singer-songwriter Preston Creed, who draws big crowds. The Summit also serves food—including some righteous chile verde nachos—every day. Mondays feature Texas Hold ‘Em. 918 Heritage Park Blvd., Layton, 801-773-8784, Facebook.com/SummitLounge

Sports Bars: You Play Here

All Star Lanes Sports Club
39.2°
Eff it, dude, let’s go bowling. Even if you “don’t roll on Shabbos,” there’s plenty to do at this clean, friendly joint—namely, drink booze and watch other sports. There are 16 taps, a full liquor shelf (though liquor isn’t allowed back in the bowling alley) and plenty of HD TVs. Sundays are packed with football fans, and there’s free Texas Hold ‘Em that night as well as Monday and Thursdays. If you’re wasted, or plan on getting there, Allstar covers taxi fare, up to 15 miles, to and fro. 1776 W. 7800 South, West Jordan, 801-566-6627

All Star Sports Bar
32.0°
Look behind the Walmart in Tooele to find this ultra-mega sports-bar fortress. Located inside of the All Star Fun Center, it’s one of the few bars in Utah where you can enjoy a cocktail while bowling. There’s also laser tag and a full arcade, so, essentially, this place is like an adult Chuck E. Cheese. The best thing about it, they’ll pick you up from wherever you are in Tooele, drive you to the bar and even drag you home, for free! 1111 N. 200 West, Tooele, 435-833-0999, AllStarLanes.com No. 5 Coldest Beer

Club DJ’s
32.5°
After the big-box stores moved out, Club DJ’s has been the anchor store of this Taylorsville strip mall. And, in a sense, the huge bar is itself a big box (of fun). DJ’s boasts 13 electronic dartboards with Wednesday and Friday dart tournaments—locker rentals are available for those expensive Tungstens. Every three months, the Utah State Dart Tournament gets things uber-competitive, but folks can also unwind with weekly karaoke and Top 40 and hip-hop rolled out by DJ Xman and DJ Big Sexxy. 3849 W. 5400 South, Taylorsville, 801-964-8575, ClubDJsUtah.com

Duffy’s Tavern
34.0°
Just a long ball away from Spring Mobile Ballpark, Duffy’s is a mecca for the diamond’s devout. Pregame here as the Bees take BP, then return to soothe your heckle-weary throat with an icy postgame brew. Even after the boys of summer go into hibernation, this is an idyllic neighborhood sports bar, with charming staff, cozy booths, a big-screen TV, darts, pool tables and a menu that includes 17 generously filled sandwiches. So root, root, root for the home team, but if they don’t win, at least there’s Duffy’s. 932 S. Main, Salt Lake City, 801-355-6401, DuffysTavernSLC.com

Fats Grill & Pool
37.9°
It’s all about pool at Fats, which has seven well-maintained tables. Music is probably a close second. The giant paintings of Jimmy Page and Jerry Garcia are your first clue; the next is the 98-capacity music venue downstairs where local bands play on Fridays and Saturdays. Fats’ burgers and pizza are also renowned for ridiculous deliciousness and, of course, there are several great beers on tap, including locals like Wyld, Sum’r, Baba and Golden Spike Hefeweizen. 2182 S. Highland Drive, Salt Lake City, 801-484-9467, FatsGrillSLC.com

Johnny’s on Second
42.2°
Is everything a game to you? Good, Johnny’s on Second should be right up your alley. Not even “Fast Eddie” Felson could lose at these pool tables, which are free until 7 p.m. every day. Other diversions include shuffleboard, pinball, electronic darts and NFL Blitz ‘99. Poker nights are held Mondays, Thursdays and Saturdays; trivia on Mondays, karaoke on Wednesdays; and live music is hosted on Saturdays. TVs are plentiful, drinks are cheap, and pizza and sandwiches can be bought at the bar. 165 E. 200 South, Salt Lake City, 801-746-3334, JohnnysOnSecond.com

Jupiter Bowl
36.2°
Part of the New Park complex near Kimball Junction, this upscale bowling alley understands that adults want toys to play with just as much as their kids do. With 16 lanes for bowling, a video-game arcade, pool tables, an intriguing cocktail list and a few local brews on tap, Jupiter is the perfect night out when you just want to play. And being Park City, they do things with just a little more flair. Instead of the typical bowling-alley fare of gooey pizza and soft drinks, for example, Jupiter goes for fried green beans, fish tacos and cubanas. Yum! 1090 Center Drive, Park City, 435-658-2695, JupiterBowl.com

Lindzee O’Michaels Mixologists
36.9°
There’s an anarchic spirit to Lindzee’s, exemplified by the 6-inch-long braided beard that bartender Sasquatch—so named for his loping walk, he says—sports, along with an infectious grin and friendly manner. “We try to give people reasons to come back,” he says. There’s a vast variety of games, from ping-pong to Australian foosball; great local bands like Dirtbags Don’t Die; and, on Sundays, the opportunity to bring in your iPod and share your music with everyone else. You could easily spend an endless array of days and nights in Lindzee’s and never get bored. 825 Main, Park City, 435-658-1183, LindzeeOMichaels.com

Maggie McGee’s
36.7°
On either side of Maggie McGee’s narrow entryway are vintage sporting goods for both winter and summer activities—so you know this Irish pub takes its sports seriously. The bartenders even wear referee uniforms. Karaoke is offered nightly and Geeks Who Drink trivia happens every Tuesday, both of which fit right in with Maggie’s friendly, competitive spirit. The kitchen serves breakfast, lunch and dinner, and the staff recommends the Mad Maggie sandwich (roast beef, chipotle-barbecue sauce, jalapeños, pepper-jack cheese, bacon) and a cold, alcoholic lime rickey. 6253 S. Highland Drive, Salt Lake City, 801-273-9899, MaggieMcGees.com

Oscar’s Social Club
39.4°
If the free UFC fights don’t already draw you to this State Street hangout, Oscar’s Social Club will lure you in with one of its other offerings—DJs on Fridays and Saturdays, and poker three nights a week on Wednesdays, Thursdays and Sundays. Thursday is also karaoke night, so if you don’t know when to fold ‘em, at least you can sing some Kenny Rogers to amp you up for next week’s antes. 8136 S. State, Midvale, 801-566-3222

West Valley Billiards
41.2°
There’s something about drinking a brew or two that aids in seeing the geometry of pool-ball angles. Beer is billiards magic. Aside from the kegs of eight draft beers at West Valley Billiards, not much has changed since it opened in 1979. It’s one of two places in the state to play golf (not the walk-ruining, sand-trap-ridden sport) on a professional-size table. And, of course, WVB offers a bevy of regulation-size billiards tables on the bar side and smaller ones (for the kiddos) on the all-ages side. 4669 W. 3500 South, West Valley City, 801-968-2200