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Oh, You Mean Those Kids


07/25/06, 18:38, Child Endangerment, 300 N. Redwood Road


“The complainant called to say that three babies had been abandoned in two strollers at the listed location. [The 21-year-old male suspect] arrived immediately before the officers arrived. He told them that his 5-year-old son and friends had pushed the [babies] to this location and he had just found out about it. Further investigation by the officers revealed that the [suspect] did not have a 5-year-old son and that he himself had left the children unattended. The one-year-old twins and the one-month-old were left in the custody of their mother. [The suspect] was charged with Child Abuse, Reckless Endangerment and false information.nn



07/25/06, 23:25, Robbery, 241 S. 500 West


“The victim went to the shelter area in search of female companionship. After picking up the unknown female black adult, 25-28 yr., 5 feet, 130 pounds, wearing a pink shirt and tan dress pants, they went to an undisclosed area. Upon returning to the Shelter, she requested he drop her off on 500 West by the ‘Rocks.’ As he stopped the car, a male white adult came out of the bushes with a gun demanding the victim’s wallet, but the victim refused. As the female was exiting the victim’s car, she stole his-hand held vacuum and fled the area with the male. The male suspect was later located by officers and identified … [the female] was transported to jail and booked for Aggravated Robbery.nn

Beer Run Hijinks


07/28/06, 03:01, Robbery/Shots Fired, 1270 S. Main


“Two male Polynesians entered the Maverik and then walked out with six cases of beer without paying. The clerk followed the suspects out of the store. The suspects went to Richards Street and a waiting silver bronze SUV. The driver, a male white, and a passenger, male Polynesian, exited the SUV when they saw the victim following the other two suspects with the beer. The passenger fired several shots from a gun at the victim. Fortunately, he was a poor shot and missed. The four suspects drove away in the SUV.nn

Bad Beat


07/25/06, 01:26, Robbery, near 1600 West Briar Rose Place


“The victims were playing cards with the suspect in the apartment. During the game, the suspect produced a gun, demanding their money. He then pistol whipped one of the victims. After taking their money, the suspect fled with another male, who had accompanied him to the apartment, but did not participate in the game. The suspect is described as a dark skinned male white adult, 20’s, 6 feet 2 inches, 280 lb., wearing a blue tank top, white shorts, and a white baseball cap on backwards. … The suspect and the other male, who was described as male black adult, 6’2”, 200 lb., fled the scene in a white Ford Explorer that was driven by a third male not witness to the incident. One victim suffered minor injuries but refused medical help.nn

The shame.


Found in Translation


07/31/06, 15:14, Drug Arrest, near 900 East and Hollywood Ave.


“The officer initiated a traffic stop, stopping the vehicle on Hollywood Ave. The driver [with a Hispanic-sounding surname] did not speak English. [Two passengers, both with Anglo-sounding surnames] did not speak Spanish. With the assistance of Spanish-speaking officers, it was determined that the stories from the driver and passengers did not match. [One of the English-speaking subjects] finally gave the officer the drugs that [the Spanish-speaking subject] threw to [him] and told him to hide when the traffic stop was initiated. The bag of drugs turned over had heroin in it.”


“Hide the s't!” means “Hide the s't!” in any language.

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About The Author

Shane Johnson

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