Bar? Restaurant? Jesus? | The Ocho | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly

Bar? Restaurant? Jesus? 

Eight ways to tell if you're in a Utah bar, not a restaurant.

Pin It
Favorite
click to enlarge news_ocho_1_170427-41036f7789514f5e.jpg
8. Overwhelming feelings of guilt, shame, and making Jesus cry.
7. They won’t serve your baby a beer and a shot.
6. The waitress is totally interested in your rant about how California’s liquor laws are better.
5. They ask your baby for a second form of ID.
4. You don’t need to order a shitty basket of chips to justify your shitty beer.
3. They suggest leaving your baby in the car with a cracked window and Radio Disney.
2. The state-legislated sign just below the “Must Be 21+ to Enter” and “Drink GuzzleBird Whiskey®”signs.
1. They won’t let you in with a baby even though you’re just there for dinner and you don’t even drink and that rule is dumb and you drove all the way from Sandy and it’s little Brayyden’s birthday and they’re being so mean right now and gosh, already!

Pin It
Favorite

Tags:

More by Bill Frost

  • Uncool for the Summer

    Eight signs that it's summer in Utah.
    • May 24, 2017
  • They Alive!

    Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt is back, as are Twin Peaks and Neon Joe.
    • May 17, 2017
  • School's Out

    Eight college commencement speeches you probably won't hear.
    • May 17, 2017
  • More »

Latest in The Ocho

  • Uncool for the Summer

    Eight signs that it's summer in Utah.
    • May 24, 2017
  • School's Out

    Eight college commencement speeches you probably won't hear.
    • May 17, 2017
  • Ratings Blowout

    Eight “breaking” local TV “news” stories for May sweeps.
    • May 10, 2017
  • More »

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Readers also liked…

  • Get Chaffetzed

    8 campaign slogans for Jason Chaffetz's run for Speaker of the House
    • Oct 7, 2015
  • Ocho, Out

    8 reasons The Ocho has been canceled
    • Nov 4, 2015

© 2017 Salt Lake City Weekly

Website powered by Foundation