John Rasmuson

On Patriotic Correctness

Armed Forces Day is a good time to take stock of your own patriotic correctness.

• By John Rasmuson
My driver license has VETERAN printed on it. It occasionally earns me a "Thanks for your service" from a well-intentioned clerk.
• Tags: Opinion

Ending as Beginning

• By John Rasmuson
"There are these two young fish swimming along, and they happen to meet an older fish swimming the other way, who nods at them and says, 'Morning, boys, how's the water?' And the two young fish swim on for a bit, and then eventually one of them looks over at the other and goes, 'What the hell is water?'"
• Tags: Opinion

Good Friend, Good

• By John Rasmuson
"Friend. Good."
• Tags: Opinion

Redeemed by Poets

The wretched state of public discourse cries out for poetic grace.

• By John Rasmuson
I was a high-school English teacher in 2001, the year Billy Collins was appointed U.S. poet laureate.
• Tags: Opinion

One in Four and More

• By John Rasmuson
I prefer the phrase "one in four" to "25 percent."
• Tags: Opinion

On Trump's Parade

• By John Rasmuson
Donald Trump might have been humming Richman's familiar tune last summer after watching a military parade in Paris commemorating Bastille Day and the French Revolution.
• Tags: Opinion

Dear Orrin

'Hypocrisy, thy name is Orrin'

• By John Rasmuson
I read that Brigham Young University and the University of Utah are vying to become the repository of Orrin Hatch's congressional papers.
• Tags: Opinion

How You See What You See

• By John Rasmuson
There is no such thing as inaccuracy in a photograph.
• Tags: Opinion

Plane Dogs

• By John Rasmuson
I've seen a look in dogs' eyes, a quickly vanishing look of amazed contempt, and I am convinced that basically dogs think humans are nuts.
• Tags: Opinion

Words Gotta Be Perfecto

• By John Rasmuson
I now get email from the president.
• Tags: Opinion