Support the Free Press | Facts matter. Truth matters. Journalism matters
Salt Lake City Weekly has been Utah's source of independent news and in-depth journalism since 1984. Donate today to ensure the legacy continues.
Friday, May 22, 2009
Stay Away From Strange, Big Birds in Utah County
Posted By Brandon Burt on May 22, 2009, 2:57 PM
The cassowary could be the meanest mofo in the bird kingdom. About as big as an ostrich with razor-sharp talons, it can and will attack humans.
... And there could be one on the loose in Utah County! If so, stay the hell away from it; it's injured and considered highly disgruntled.
The cassowary's plumage is really quite striking--like Carol Channing after her third costume change. And, like a Carol Channing costume change, it costs a couple hundred grand.
Here's a picture of a cassowary attacking a guy using specialized anti-cassowary protective equipment.
Kids, don't try this at home:
On Topic...
-
Music Plus: Jan. 17
New music from David Lindes, Eyes of Eva and The Alpines
- Jan 18, 2025
-
Film Reviews: New Releases for Jan. 17
Wolf Man, The Brutalist, Hard Truths, Nickel Boys, September 5 and more
- Jan 16, 2025
-
Film Reviews: New Releases for Jan. 10
Den of Thieves: Pantera, Better Man, The Last Showgirl
- Jan 10, 2025
- More Brandon's Big Gay Blog » More Culture »
More by Brandon Burt
-
FLASHBACK 2006: Brandon Burt's handy guide for the aspiring academic fraud
So You're Thinking of Becoming a Cheat
- Jul 8, 2024
- More »
Latest in Buzz Blog
