Friday, May 1, 2009
Andy and the Squirrel (from my boy Fletch)
Posted By Rebecca Walsh on May 1, 2009, 12:42 PM
On Sunday we had the in-laws over for dinner and I made no bones about the fact that I needed to sit on the side of the table where I could see the TV. The Yankees were playing the Red Sox, I never get to watch baseball and... well, I paid for the god damn TV.
So dinner comes and goes, the in-laws leave and my wife, who we’ll call “Angie” tells me to take the kids up to give them a bath. Let’s call them “Opey” and “Alex.” Now, I don't mind this so much because I have a nice TV in the bedroom (which I also paid for) and I can put the kids in our tub. They will entertain themselves and I can watch another 2-3 innings of the game.
15 minutes later, my wife who we’ll call “Angie” comes up and asks me if I would go down and get the kids' drinks for bed. No problem, it is a commercial so off I go. When I come back she has changed the channel to some HGTV home improvement show, which of course are ALL THE SAME!!! When I ask her if I can switch the channel back she says, and I quote "Baseball is boring. Hours go by and nothing happens. You watch hours and hours of sports..."
Just as I am standing there aghast, wondering how I ever fell in love with this woman, let alone married her in the first place, a commercial comes on the home improvement channel so I quickly switch it back to baseball just as Ellersby steals home. I am screaming at the top of my lungs, Opey is screaming, Alex is screaming and all “Angie” can do is say, and I quote "Hmmm, I guess every once in a while even a blind squirrel finds his nuts."
At which point she sends me downstairs with my adult beverage to watch the rest of the game by myself because she is tired.
Classic.
— Fletch
So dinner comes and goes, the in-laws leave and my wife, who we’ll call “Angie” tells me to take the kids up to give them a bath. Let’s call them “Opey” and “Alex.” Now, I don't mind this so much because I have a nice TV in the bedroom (which I also paid for) and I can put the kids in our tub. They will entertain themselves and I can watch another 2-3 innings of the game.
15 minutes later, my wife who we’ll call “Angie” comes up and asks me if I would go down and get the kids' drinks for bed. No problem, it is a commercial so off I go. When I come back she has changed the channel to some HGTV home improvement show, which of course are ALL THE SAME!!! When I ask her if I can switch the channel back she says, and I quote "Baseball is boring. Hours go by and nothing happens. You watch hours and hours of sports..."
Just as I am standing there aghast, wondering how I ever fell in love with this woman, let alone married her in the first place, a commercial comes on the home improvement channel so I quickly switch it back to baseball just as Ellersby steals home. I am screaming at the top of my lungs, Opey is screaming, Alex is screaming and all “Angie” can do is say, and I quote "Hmmm, I guess every once in a while even a blind squirrel finds his nuts."
At which point she sends me downstairs with my adult beverage to watch the rest of the game by myself because she is tired.
Classic.
— Fletch
On Topic...
-
Theater review: "A Wall Apart"
World-premiere musical emphasizes the struggles of human separation
- Aug 20, 2019
-
Music Live Extra Aug. 19
Shamarr Allen at Mystic Hot Springs, video premiere by Robyn Cage and memoryfield
- Aug 19, 2019
-
Movie Reviews: Angry Birds Movie 2, Blinded By the Light, Good Boys
Ode to Joy, Honeyland, Mike Wallace is Here, Where'd You Go Bernadette
- Aug 16, 2019
- More Sports » More Culture »
More by Rebecca Walsh
-
Block the Vote
Conservatives try to make voting a privilege
- Oct 24, 2012
-
Creating a Martyr
KSL should've just let The New Normal get canceled
- Oct 3, 2012
-
Rich Mitt
Romney-Reid scuffle highlights Mormon's uncomfortable relationship with wealth
- Aug 29, 2012
- More »
Latest in Buzz Blog
