Plus: Cristela, Jane the Virgin, Marry Me
Season Premiere: Walking Dead Fanatic: "Why do we have to wait so long between seasons? Whhhyyy?!"
More reviews: Gracepoint, Mulaney, Homeland
On second viewing, The Only TV Column That Matters™ has revised its assessment of Bad Judge: Kate Walsh is still great as a party-animal judge, but this sitcom is an underdeveloped mess, even compared to NBC's own Mysteries of Laura, the fall TV season's designated Underdeveloped Mess.
More reviews: Family Guy, Selfie, Stalker
Season Premiere: As in, final season, Parentheads—you have 13 episodes to make peace with the impending departure of the Braverman family.
More reviews: Mr. Pickles, Scorpion, Forever, Black-ish
Series Debut: When the Secretary of State is killed in a plane crash, Elizabeth McCord (Téa Leoni), who quit the CIA years ago over "ethical issues," is yanked out of her college-professor gig to replace him ... sure.
More reviews: New Girl, The Mindy Project, Red Band Society, Mysteries of Laura
The Only TV Column That Matters™ had high hopes for Z Nation, Syfy's would-be answer to The Walking Dead—not officially, but at this point in the game, any new zombie-based series will automatically be labeled as such.
Television will rot your brain—and here’s True TV’s guide to blissful oblivion
Gotham (Fox) The "Garfield minus Garfield" quips regarding Gotham's "Batman minus Batman" origin story are valid, as is the observation that it's just a highly stylized cop show with the occasional glimpse of a future villain ("Hey, look, the Penguin! And there's Poison Ivy!").
Returning series and new debuts on cable for fall 2014
Sons of Anarchy (FX; Tuesday, Sept. 9) Season Premiere: In the seventh and final season premiere, Jax sets a new mission for SAMCRO: Avenge the murder of Tara, as soon as he figures out who did it.