Sharknado 2: The Second One

Chum of All Fears: Take the Sharknado 2: The Second One quiz!

Married, You're the Worst

Also premiering this week: Rush, Satisfaction, The Lottery

Ray Donovan, Masters of Sex, The Strain

Plus: Welcome to Sweden, Working the Engels, Hemlock Grove

Extant, The Bridge

Plus: Bad Teacher, Finding Carter, Married at First Sight
Series Debut: The Only TV Column That Matters™ has been telling you that television is a greater medium than film for over a decade now, but it takes CBS getting Halle Berry on the tube for you to finally pay attention? What-ever.

The Leftovers, Under the Dome

Plus: Rake, Reckless, Californication
Series Debut: As the Summer of the TV Apocalypse continues, Lost’s Damon Lindelof takes on the series adaptation of The Leftovers, a 2011 novel about a Rapture-ish event in which 2 percent of the Earth’s population mysteriously

Dominion, Rectify, The Last Ship

Plus: True Blood, CeeLo Green’s The Good Life
Series Debut: After the Season 2 premiere of cowboys & aliens future western Defiance—yes, they’re still defying their asses off—Syfy drops another big-budget original, Dominion,

Game of Thrones, Louie

Plus: Fargo, Rizzoli & Isles, I Love the 2000s
Season Finale: Not only has this been the most rape-y and head-popping season of Game of Thrones yet, but also the most-watched ever: Season 4 has averaged 18.4 million viewers, beating out The Sopranos as HBO’s highest-rated

Orange Is the New Black, Power

Plus: Finding Bigfoot, Murder In the First, Big Smo
Season Premiere: How badly did Piper (Taylor Schilling) beat down Pennsatucky (Taryn Manning) at the end of Season 1? The bigger, more unexpected question is, were the two alone at the scene?

Undateable, Halt and Catch Fire

Plus: Crossbones, Rock & Roll Hall of Fame, Longmire
Series Debut: When Whitney debuted in 2011, The Only TV Column That Matters™ asked, “Who’s this funny Chris D’Elia guy?” and “Why the hell are networks still producing laugh-tracked comedies in the 21st century?”

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