The Ocho | Smoke 'Em If Ya Got 'Em 

n

Eight eventual benefits of the smoking ban going into effect in Utah bars Jan. 1, 2009:

n

8. More stamina to outrun Mayor Becker’s hybrid police cars.

n

7. Finally knowing what your favorite dive really smells like.

n

6. No more women snubbing advances with a cigarette butt to your forehead.

n

5. Finally knowing what your favorite stripper really looks like.

n

4. A much healthier environment in which to ingest alcohol and fried food.

n

3. No more feeling like chain-smoking jazz musicians are cooler than you.

n

2. Saving enough money on cigarettes to buy first concealed weapon.

n

1. Breaking one less Word of Wisdom code on the weekends.

Pin It
Favorite

More by Bill Frost

  • Viva Shark Vegas

    Sharknado: The 4th Awakens hits Sin City; Squidbillies are 'Merica.
    • Jul 27, 2016
  • Dark Horse

    BoJack Horseman returns, tragicomic as ever; Looking says buh-bye.
    • Jul 20, 2016
  • School's In

    Vice Principals takes Eastbound & Down to class; BrainDead isn't dead yet.
    • Jul 13, 2016
  • More »

Latest in News

  • So It Goes

    Majestic Meadows mobile home park residents struggle with unexpected rent increases.
    • Jul 27, 2016
  • Smoke Signals

    Amid allegation of questionable bonuses, UFA Deputy Chief steps down.
    • Jul 21, 2016
  • A Voice for Victims

    Former state prosecutor spies potential changes in the criminal justice system.
    • Jul 20, 2016
  • More »

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

‚Äč

Readers also liked…

  • Wild and Dead

    Cause of burro deaths a mystery for BLM.
    • Jun 22, 2016
  • Growing Trend

    The old-timey trade of barbering is booming in Utah—but some say catering to style makes for risky business
    • Dec 23, 2014

© 2016 Salt Lake City Weekly

Website powered by Foundation