The Essentials | City Weekly’s Entertainment Picks June 26-July 2 

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By Jennifer Heaney

If JERRY SEINFELD could be summarized in one word, that word would be “cadence.” Seinfeld has a way of speaking that any American adult can instantly identify and imitate to some degree. His tone of voice and awkward pauses are the essence of his comedic style. It’s his cadence, not his jokes, that makes Jerry Seinfeld one of America’s most distinctive comedians.Ever since he walked away from his immensely popular television show a decade ago'yes, it has been that long'he’s been exploring new avenues, and at the same time, returning to old familiar ways. His return to performing as a stand-up comedian was brilliantly captured in the 2002 documentary Comedian. He wrote a children’s book called Halloween, adapted from his own stand-up material. It is also widely speculated that he wrote the books Letters From a Nut and Stories From a Moron under pseudonyms. He has appeared as a guest star in a few television shows. And he co-wrote, co-produced and provided the main character’s voice in the 2007 feature Bee Movie. His name is being thrown around as a possible host for the soon-to-be American version of the British TV phenomenon Top Gear.So, yeah, he’s busy. But Utahns have the chance to catch him one night only as he performs two shows of comedy that will have you laughing at the little things in life again.Jerry Seinfeld @ Abravanel Hall, 123 W. South Temple, 355-2787, Friday, June 27, 7 & 9:30 pm.
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By Geoff Griffin
The average, high temperature in Salt Lake City on June 28 is 86 degrees Fahrenheit. In the mid-afternoon, the temperature at the asphalt-laden, largely shadeless Utah State Fairgrounds can approach triple digits. On June 28, the temperature in one of the mosh pits at the VANS WARPED TOUR will be just this side of 200. The annual event is a summer survival course, particularly for those who insist on wearing black and/or leather. Only two words are more important than “piercings” and “tattoos”: “water” and “sunscreen.”Patrons are required to empty all liquid before entering the festival, but there are open taps on site where you can fill up containers for free, as long as you don’t mind lines and lukewarm water. The more realistic solution is to bring plenty of extra cash to buy bottled water, along with the occasional $5 CD from some obscure band that pays for gas money to make the next tour stop.The worst of the heat can be avoided by showing up late in the afternoon, which also means avoiding lines at the entrance which can easily top an hour’s wait earlier int the day. Of course, you might miss the bands you really care about (like, perhaps, Every Time I Die, pictured), since it’s hard to find the schedule anywhere but at the festival itself. The best solution is to find someone more hardcore (and heat resistant) than you to go early and call you with the times for your favorites.2008 Vans Warped Tour @ Utah State Fairgrounds, 155 N. 1000 West, Saturday, June 28. Gates at 11 a.m.

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By Eric D. Snider

Austin, Texas’ Alamo Drafthouse is a legendary movie theater and full-service restaurant that prides itself on unique programming and interactive fun. And now you don’t have to kick yourself for not living in Austin, because the Alamo is bringing its “rolling roadshow” to Morgan, Utah, for a three-day celebration of the most famous movie ever filmed there: Troll 2.The 1990 horror flick also has the distinction of being one of the worst movies ever made'and believe me, the Alamo is well aware of this. It’s one of those “so bad, it’s good” things, although it would be more accurate to call it “so bad, it’s enjoyable.” It’s still not “good.” Anyway, more than a dozen cast members, along with the writer and director, will be at the NILBOG INVASION (a reference to the fictional “goblin-spelled-backwards” town in the film) for an outdoor screening of the film on a huge, drive-in-size screen. Five other films, including the first Troll and various associated works, also will be screened during the festival. Plus: games, panels, contests and general campy merriment, all themed to fit the movie. (Visit the official Troll 2 fansite,, for a more detailed day-by-day list of events.)Various passes are available, ranging from $15 for the Troll 2 and related Saturday-night screenings, to $170 for an all-access, all-weekend VIP pass. How much are you willing to spend for the sake of irony? That is the question you must ask yourself.Nilbog Invasion: The Troll 2 Celebration @ 250 N. Commercial St., Morgan, Utah, one hour northeast of Salt Lake City, June 27-29.

Here&Now: Other New Happenings This Week

STEPHEN SINGULAR Author of the new Warren Jeffs/FLDS profile When Men Become Gods reads from and signs his work. Sam Weller’s Bookstore, 254 S. Main, 328-2586, Thursday, June 26, 7 p.m.

UTAH ARTS FESTIVAL Four days of art, music, food and frivolity. Library Square, 400 South & 200 East, 322-2428, June 26-29,

CASH LEVY Fifteen years of stand-up experience has earned Levy spots on Comedy Central, MTV and West Valley’s Wiseguys Comedy stage. Wiseguys Comedy Cafe, 2500 S. 220 West, 463-2909, June 26-29,

ALTAR BOYZ Poke fun at consumer culture & Christian boy bands with this off-Broadway comedy smash. Egyptian Theatre, 328 Main, Park City, 435-649-9371, June 27-Aug. 2,

INTI RAYMI FESTIVAL Traditional Peruvian food, dance and music in honor of the Incan Sun God. Kingsbury Hall, 1395 E. Presidents Circle, 581-7100, Saturday, June 28, 6 p.m.

GT LIVE An interactive motor sports experience, including “Sim Race,” open track opportunities and pro/am “drifting.” Miller Motorsports Park, 2901 N. Sheep Lane, Tooele, 435-277-7223, June 28-29, 7 a.m.-8 p.m.

LOCAL FIRST UTAH INDEPENDENTS WEEK Join Local First Utah in honoring independent business with a week of workshops, sidewalk parties, cook-offs and farmers market festivities. Various locations, 456-1456, June 28-July 5,

INTERMEZZO CHAMBER MUSIC The summer series opens with music by Piazzolla, Ravel and new work by Anthony DiLorenzo. Westminster College Gore Concert Hall, 1840 S. 1300 East, 832-2457, Monday, June 30, 7:30 p.m.

ANN CANNON Local author celebrates the release of her latest work of young adult fiction, The Loser’s Guide to Life and Love. King’s English Bookshop, 1511 S. 1500 East, 484-9100, Wednesday, July 2, 7 p.m.

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