Super Bowl Party Don'ts | The Ocho | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly

Super Bowl Party Don'ts 

Eight Super Bowl party mistakes to avoid this year.

Pin It
Favorite
click to enlarge art13184widea.jpg
Eight Super Bowl party mistakes to avoid this year:

8. Don’t insist that your sketch-comedy troupe provide the “alternative” halftime show.

7. Don’t buy an off-brand HD TV the day before at Krazy Karl’s Kloseout Korner …

6. … even if it does come with a free vat of “semi-fresh” Slovakian buffalo wings.

5. Don’t invite wives or girlfriends—unless they’re strippers, chefs or nurses who can treat Slovakian buffalo-wing poisoning.

4. Don’t keep changing the channel to The Puppy Bowl because you have “some serious money riding on the pug/shih tzu spread.”

3. Don’t turn off the sound and plug in the “kick-ass Nickelback mix” you made for game day … and your wedding reception.

2. Don’t drag out your old “Soccer is the more cerebral sport and I’m still pissed that none of you came to my World Cup party” rant.

1. Don’t acknowledge any prior familiarity with Glee when it comes on after the game; stifle squeals and use of “jazz hands.”

Pin It
Favorite

More by Bill Frost

  • What a Drag

    RuPaul's Drag Race returns to make America great again; Harlots hooks historically.
    • Mar 22, 2017
  • Thumb This

    Eight review systems considered to replace Netflix’s 5-star ratings besides Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down.
    • Mar 22, 2017
  • Ham Fist

    Marvel's Iron Fist packs little punch; Into the Badlands delivers the kung-fu action.
    • Mar 15, 2017
  • More »

Latest in The Ocho

  • Thumb This

    Eight review systems considered to replace Netflix’s 5-star ratings besides Thumbs Up/Thumbs Down.
    • Mar 22, 2017
  • Statewide Kilting Spree

    Eight pros and cons of St. Patrick’s Day in Utah.
    • Mar 15, 2017
  • Celestial Suburbs

    Eight Utah-sourced names for the seven planets of NASA’s recently discovered solar system:
    • Mar 8, 2017
  • More »

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Readers also liked…

  • WhiskeyPete Was Here

    8 other suspected "secret" online pseudonyms used by Mayor Ralph Becker's spokesman besides "WhiskeyPete" on The Salt Lake Tribune's website
    • Aug 5, 2015
  • Ocho, Out

    8 reasons The Ocho has been canceled
    • Nov 4, 2015

© 2017 Salt Lake City Weekly

Website powered by Foundation