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Note: Private Eye is on vacation this week.

It’s hot outside'95 degrees in New York City and 103 in Salt Lake City. What are you doing to beat the heat, and now do you believe in global warming?

Stephen Matney: Yesterday I woke up in a tub of ice with a note next to me. It told me that I needed immediate medical attention because I didn’t have one of my kidneys anymore. I didn’t get immediate medical attention. It really felt good in that ice.

Tiffany Bost: I have always believed in global warming, and I find that the best way to beat the heat is to drink as much ice cold beer as possible. Doctor’s orders!

Jason Gerbing: I’ll just have to stay inside and hang out on MySpace all day. Global warming is a real threat. I’m so super-cereal.

Nathan Levinson: I’ve developed an urban utility belt equipped with baby wipes and talcum powder. I’ve also been forced to stop wearing all undergarments.

Stephen Dark: Lying on my back in my pool, a beer in one hand, looking up at the clear blue skies and wondering what this planet will be like for my kids when they’re my age.

Andrea Walcher: Don’t beat the heat, join it. This weekend, I spent my time canyoneering in Zion with deep slot canyons and pools of water to keep us cool. I would rather be in the heat in nature than in my overly air-conditioned office. Oh, and I never stopped believing in global warming.

Hailey Hodges: Get the heck out of Dodge and go to the mountains. One can only sit under a swamp cooler for so long.

Victor Serrano: The recent temps do not bother me at all. I stay cool easily. As for global warming, come on! This is a cycle that has existed for thousands of years. Take a look at this past weekend 2,000 years ago. I dare you.

Shauna Brennan: Global warming is fact. Turning a blind eye only makes it worse. I’m not convinced that our current high temps are due to global warming, though. It is July, after all. To cool off, I like to hit the slip & slide or take a hike and swim in the watershed.

James Burnitt: I’ve always believed in global warming. We’re obviously killing our planet and making it inhospitable for future generations. I’m dreaming of sabotaging the air conditioning in every household that votes Republican, then toasting their suffering with a frosty mug of good, strong beer.

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