Modesty First 

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Curses, Foiled Again
Detectives investigating an armed robbery at a convenience store in Greentown, Ind., caught a break when one of the crooks left his credit card at the crime scene. When they executed a search warrant at the suspect’s home, they found evidence leading to the other three suspects, along with money, guns, clothing and other items associated with the robbery, as well as a home video surveillance system. “Examination of the system’s memory showed all four suspects preparing for and returning from the robbery,” reported investigators, who arrested Luke K. Spence, 22, Elliott V. Shoffner, 22, Christopher A. Taylor, 26, and Gregory M. Riley, 25. (Kokomo Tribune)

Shahid Mohammed Kalam, 22, deposited a $1,000 forged or stolen check at a credit union ATM in Hernando, Fla., then tried to withdraw cash, according to police, who noted his ATM card had expired and that he was using an improper personal identification number. When the machine took the card, Kalam backed his vehicle against the building, tied a seatbelt to the ATM and tried to rip it from the wall. When that tactic failed, he fired a stolen .25-caliber handgun through the front door. Police used the ATM surveillance camera to identify Kalam as the suspect and arrested him when he returned to the credit union for other business. (Hernando Today)

Modesty First
The Wreck Beach Preservation Society asked municipal officials in Vancouver, British Columbia, to ban ogling at Vancouver’s best-known nude beach. Society spokesperson Judy Williams told the Metro Vancouver environment and parks committee that party boats and jet skis have been flocking to Wreck Beach and spoiling its secluded ambiance. (CBC News)

Slightest Provocation
Robert Hagerman, 56, called 911 in Pinellas, Fla., to report his daughter was hitting him, throwing things and using drugs. Sheriff’s deputies determined he was lying after his daughter played them a cell-phone recording of his threats to make false statements to the police. She explained Hagerman really called them because she wouldn’t buy him a beer. (Tampa Bay Times)

Sex Is Its Own Punishment
Police arrested April Dawn Peters, 31, in Newport, Tenn., after they said she hit a 51-year-old man on the head at least five times with a hammer while they were having sex. Sgt. Steve Johnson reported that Peters had also been having sex with the hammer. (The Newport Plain Talk)

Memories Are Made for Moments Like This
Police arrested a man suspected of breaking into his neighbor’s house in Greeley, Colo., and taking sex toys. Police Sgt. Susan West said the victim happened to have several photographs of the missing toys that matched the items found during a search of the suspect’s home. (Denver’s KMGH-TV)

Looking for Loopholes
Nite Moves strip club in Albany, N.Y., is seeking to avoid paying $124,000 in back taxes by claiming its nude lap dances are exempt under state law as “live dramatic or musical arts performances.” An administrative law judge agreed with Nite Moves, pointing out, “The fact that the dancers remove all or part of their costume … simply does not render such dance routines as something less than choreographed performances.” But the state Tax Appeals Tribunal disagreed, as did an Appellate Division court, which ruled Nite Moves didn’t establish that private dances offered at its club are choreographed performances and noted Nite Moves dancers aren’t required to have any formal dance training. “It’s definitely a form of art,” one dancer, who declined to give her name, insisted. “Some girls are up there practicing for hours.” (Associated Press)

Adding Insult to Injury
A Tennessee judge arraigned Stacy Duggan for child neglect after her 11-year-old son apparently shot her in the head at their Loudon County home. Her husband, Daniel Duggan, also faces charges after the shooting, for leaving the gun where the boy could find it. (Knoxville’s WBIR-TV)

New York’s Finest
When New York City police spotted Tamon Robinson, 23, digging up decorative paving stones, he fled on foot, only to be struck and killed by a pursuing police cruiser. The city billed his family $710 for the damage his body did to the vehicle. City officials eventually acknowledged the collection notice was sent in error and apologized. (The New York Times)

Lost Soles
Neglect, termites, mold and tropical humidity are destroying the shoes of Imelda Marcos. After she and her husband, President Ferdinand Marcos, fled the Philippines in 1986, they left behind his clothing and at least 1,220 pairs of her shoes. Two years ago, staffers at the presidential palace noticed the apparel was threatened, so they transferred 150 cartons of clothes and shoes to Manila’s National Museum for safekeeping. There, the items deteriorated even further because the boxes were abandoned in a padlocked hall that had no facilities to protect the relics and was inundated by tropical rains due to a leak in the ceiling. An extensive rescue effort is under way, although many of Imelda Marcos’s shoes are beyond repair. Meanwhile, in suburban Marikina city, where officials borrowed 800 pairs of the former first lady’s shoes in 2001 for a shoe museum, about 765 pairs survived floods and still look almost new due to the museum’s meticulous care, which includes displaying them in airtight and dust-free glass cabinets in an air-conditioned gallery, away from direct sunlight. Noting the shoe collection draws a daily crowd of 50 to 100 Philippine and foreign tourists, museum manager Jane Ballesteros said, “The first word they utter is, ‘Wow,’” adding, “Her shoes never fail to astound people years after.” (Associated Press)

Recipe for Disaster
In a recorded interrogation presented during the Los Angeles murder trial of David Viens, 49, the chef admitted boiling the body of his 39-year-old wife for four days until little was left but her skull. His motive was to hide evidence of her death. A jury convicted Viens of second-degree murder. (CBS News)

Fetish of the Week
Police who arrested Eric Carrier, 24, in Hampton, N.H., said he posted an ad on Craigslist seeking a female caregiver because he “could not control his bowel movements due to a brain injury.” According to investigators, he “indicated that he required assistance in changing soiled under garments.” After he met with a woman and asked her to change his soiled underwear, she became suspicious and called police, who learned that Carrier isn’t disabled and was convicted of a similar ploy this summer. (Boston’s WBZ-TV)

Compiled from the press reports by Roland Sweet. Authentication on demand.