Mainstream Media Secrets | The Ocho | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly

Mainstream Media Secrets 

8 more stories they're keeping from you

Pin It
Favorite
click to enlarge art16742.jpg

Eight more news stories the Mainstream Media is keeping from you:

8. Fox News is actually an elaborate prank by a Canadian sketch-comedy troupe.

7. Six out of 10 ghost hunters are just in it for the cool jumpsuits.

6. Ten out of 10 Bigfoot hunters were too stoned to pursue ghost hunting.

5. Hot Ukrainian girls really are waiting to meet you, but you keep ignoring their emails.

4. “Push to Walk” buttons at street intersections are all wired to a pacemaker that keeps underworld god Zord alive.

3. No one dares admit that Homeland is completely ridiculous.

2. The government controls elections, the weather and rationing of the McRib.

1. Anyone paying attention to the Mainstream Media has aged out of the demographic the Mainstream Media cares about.

Twitter: @Bill_Frost

Pin It
Favorite

Speaking of The Ocho

  • Get a Job!

    8 red-flag phrases in local Craigslist job listings
    • May 7, 2014
  • Drinko de Mayo

    8 gringo drink specials to avoid on Cinco de Mayo
    • Apr 30, 2014
  • Utah ... Man?

    8 proposed "inclusive" lyric changes to the University of Utah's fight song
    • Apr 9, 2014
  • More »

More by Bill Frost

  • Bad Hombres

    The Blacklist: Redemption spies hard; Taken is a piss-poor prequel.
    • Feb 22, 2017
  • Outdoor Derailers

    Eight Gov. Gary Herbert-endorsed conventions to replace Utah’s biannual Outdoor Retailer show:
    • Feb 22, 2017
  • Fast Frankenfood

    Eight new fast-food innovations coming soon to top Taco Bell’s Naked Chicken Chalupa:
    • Feb 15, 2017
  • More »

Latest in The Ocho

  • Outdoor Derailers

    Eight Gov. Gary Herbert-endorsed conventions to replace Utah’s biannual Outdoor Retailer show:
    • Feb 22, 2017
  • Fast Frankenfood

    Eight new fast-food innovations coming soon to top Taco Bell’s Naked Chicken Chalupa:
    • Feb 15, 2017
  • Damned Grammys

    Eight more artists boycotting the 2017 Grammy Awards besides Kanye West, Drake and Justin Bieber:
    • Feb 8, 2017
  • More »

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Readers also liked…

  • SLC FYI

    8 facts and tips for first-timers visiting Salt Lake City
    • Jul 15, 2015
  • Get Chaffetzed

    8 campaign slogans for Jason Chaffetz's run for Speaker of the House
    • Oct 7, 2015

© 2017 Salt Lake City Weekly

Website powered by Foundation