DABC Secrets | The Ocho | Salt Lake City | Salt Lake City Weekly

DABC Secrets 

8 DABC audit findings

Pin It
Favorite
click to enlarge art14860widea.jpg

Eight findings in a recent audit of the Utah Department of Alcoholic Beverage Control:

8. Expensive bottles on the top shelves at State Liquor Stores are filled with rubbing alcohol and “just for show.”

7. As are the bottles on the bottom shelves, “but at those prices, nobody notices.”

6. Closed liquor store buildings have been secretly rented out to host Xtreme Midget Wresting events.

5. The DABC spends thousands of dollars annually on heaters to keep beer warm during winter months.

4. Meandering bums in liquor stores are really actors paid to portray “cautionary tales.”

3. It’s actually not cheaper to light a “Closed” sign for 15 hours rather than an “Open” sign for nine.

2. The $7 million DABC warehouse doesn’t exist; all alcohol is purchased and shipped from Trader Joe’s in Reno.

1. State government is as good at managing booze as they are anything else.

Twitter: @Bill_Frost | BillFrost.tv

Pin It
Favorite

More by Bill Frost

  • Final Exit

    Mary Kills People goes dark; The Handmaid's Tale goes darker.
    • Apr 19, 2017
  • Eco Chamber

    Eight ways to celebrate Earth Day 2017.
    • Apr 19, 2017
  • Robot Roll Call!

    Mystery Science Theater 3000 returns; Fargo spins another frozen fable.
    • Apr 12, 2017
  • More »

Latest in The Ocho

  • Eco Chamber

    Eight ways to celebrate Earth Day 2017.
    • Apr 19, 2017
  • Easter? Barely Knew Her

    Eight fun factoids about Easter.
    • Apr 12, 2017
  • Hardly Art

    Eight Utah “state works of art” that deserve as much designation as the Spiral Jetty
    • Apr 5, 2017
  • More »

Comments

Subscribe to this thread:

Add a comment

Readers also liked…

  • Red, White & Blew

    8 lesser-known patriotic songs for your 9/11 Spotify playlist
    • Sep 9, 2015
  • Get Chaffetzed

    8 campaign slogans for Jason Chaffetz's run for Speaker of the House
    • Oct 7, 2015

© 2017 Salt Lake City Weekly

Website powered by Foundation