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Fulton Files

War is for Sale, Junk Food is Go!

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - War is for Sale, Junk Food is Go! It has become a war measured by Websites and marketing. Iraqi Minister of Information Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf—on “temporary leave of his duties”—has his own Website at www.welovetheiraqiinformationminister....

News & Columns

Fulton Files

Weapons of Mass Hypocrisy

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - If there’s one discernable assumption among the American public in our post-Sept. 11 world, it’s this: The Muslims of the world are wild-eyed, fanatical beasts bent on destroying everything we hold dear, while America’s religious life...

News & Columns

Fulton Files

Chance Shootings

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - My, but it’s been a busy couple of weeks in the life of gunland Utah, has it not? The incidents swerve all over the map of chance, fate, accident and intention. In Ogden, a man becomes so upset over the Spanish grade of his girlfriend’s daughter...

News & Columns

Fulton Files

Sex Really Freaks Us Out, Doesn’t It?

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - Sex Really Freaks Us Out, Doesn’t It? Let it never be said that a Street Prophet who dressed in Biblical-style bedsheets couldn’t single-handedly bring down the core of Salt Lake City’s mightiest daily newspaper en route to finding...

News & Columns

Fulton Files

“Charbucks,” Jerking Off Deconstructed and Rock Houses

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - Word has it that when someone confronted New York City Mayor Michael Bloomberg about the city’s dearth of public restrooms, Bloomberg said the city’s tourists are more than welcome to dive into any nearby Starbucks for quick relief. After...

News & Columns

Fulton Files

Mayoral Liver, D is for Driving and a $1,707 Puzzle

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - The Deseret News’ editorial policy regarding alcohol operates much like a physical law of gravity. That is, alcohol must always and forever be brought down, as in very, very low down. Which is fine, really. There are plenty of knuckleheads who need...

News & Columns

Fulton Files

End of the World? Just in Time!

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - An eschatological itch is fast descending on our world. Never mind American Christians who want to see the Jerusalem temple rebuilt and Palestinians plowed underfoot so that Jesus can return to earth for a gourmet cup of coffee and a few words with management....

News & Columns

Fulton Files

Bellies, Smoke and Guns

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - You hear it all the time, especially from conservative circles: Public tax dollars should not fund this or that because it is, 1. immoral, 2. offensive, or 3. insults the image or likeness of Ronald Reagan. The implication is that democracy comes equipped...

News & Columns

Fulton Files

It’s in the Cards

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - In one form or another, gambling is now officially legal in every American state except Hawaii, Tennessee, and home sweet home. But playing cards is all the rage. Blame the Pentagon, and the national penchant for keeping score. First there was the U.S....

News & Columns

Fulton Files

Programmed to Self-Destruct

By Ben Fulton
POSTED // Jun 11,2007 - When was the last time you attempted to download “God Bless Our Homes & Families,” “I Am Happy,” “Climb Inside His Loving Arms,” or that durable show-stopper “America Rocks!”? Be quick, now. And, most...
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