Sip your drink whenever you hear “Obamacare,” chug when you hear “Ronald Reagan” and take a shot when you hear “Founding Fathers.”
Every political debate could benefit from an attentive audience paying close attention to the issues. If you are one of those people who can speak politics better when you’ve thrown a couple shots down your neck then here are the rules for you when it comes to the pre-convention GOP Senate debates. The first debate is tonight and you can watch it online here tonight at 7 p.m.
Note: drink serving sizes are recommendations please feel free to adjust as your tolerance/problem dictates.
Sip When You Hear:
Obamacare, Mitt Romney, references to your debt-laden children in some dystopian socialist future, Rick Santorum, Medicaid, Medicare, private sector
Chug When You Hear:
Ronald Reagan, entitlement reform, secure the border, socialism, the free market, use of the President’s middle name “Hussein” said with emphasis, referencing the Constitution down to section and title. Cut, cap and balance
Take a Shot When You Hear:
Founding Fathers, any time a candidate talks about the evils of Democrats and in the same speech talks about being able to work across the aisles. References to class warfare and/or those smelly Occupy kids. Jabs at Hatch for being “too establishment.” Jabs at Liljenquist for being “untested” and Hatch and Liljenquist even acknowledging Herrod’s presence at the debate.
For Hatch supporters the sipping drink of choice is an Old Fashioned (Whiskey, soda water, bitters, cherry, slice of orange all muddled with a little sugar). If Hatch references accomplishments that happened more than 20 years ago chug this drink.
For Chris Herrod supporters a bonus shooting drink for this foe of undocumented immigrants is a Prairie Fire shot (tequila and Tabasco sauce). Supporters must shoot drink if Herrod references how hard it was for his legal-immigrant wife to become a citizen.
For Dan Liljenquist supporters: At the end of the debate Liljenquist supporters—regardless of intoxication levels--must be able to draw a diagram illustrating in simple terms the former legislator’s state pension and Medicaid reform plans without vomiting on themselves…because…that would be embarrassing.
City Weekly encourages all Utahns to drink, think and vote carefully.