Dear GYA, You may have heard that the DABC is considering making customers at restaurants show intent to purchase food when ordering a drink, but I'd like to clarify what we mean by "intent." We want you to beg for it. Yeah, that's right. Put this gag ball in your mouth, get on your hands and knees, enter the restaurant through a tiny doggy door and literally beg for that 3.2 percent Coors Original. Anything happening this weekend better than some S&M action from the DABC? - Bill Bernut, DABC official
Bill, This is a good idea. May I suggest that you also incorporate some sort of blood offering, as well? Here's what's up for this weekend. Let's start with Friday's events:
The country singer behind "Accidental Racist," Brad Paisley, will be at Usana Amphitheater tonight. The show starts at 7. Tickets start at $25.
At Spring Mobile Ballpark, the Bees will be taking on the Cubs. The game starts at 7 p.m. Tickets start at $5.
Mark Curry, the stand-up comedian and actor from the '90s sitcom Hangin With Mr. Cooper, will be at Wiseguys West Valley tonight. The show starts at 7:30. Tickets are $20.
Urban Lounge will be hosting its monthly dubstep installment, Dubwise, beginning at 8 p.m. Tickets are $5.
Pop r&b singer Bruno Mars will be onstage at The Maverik Center this evening. The show starts at 8. Tickets start at $40.
The Bees will be taking on the Storm Chasers tonight at Spring Mobile Ballpark. The game starts at 7. Tickets start at $5.
Folk-rap duo Aesop Rock and Kimya Dawson will be performing at Kilby Court this evening. The show starts at 7. Tickets start at $18.
West Coast funk band the Monophonics will be playing a free show at Canyons Resort tonight. The show starts at 6.
The Tolchock Trio will be playing their final show tonight at the Urban Lounge. The show starts at 8. Tickets are $5.
The SaltCycle Team and Group Ride will be starting off at Liberty Park at 10 a.m. Everyone's welcome!
Salt Lake Acting Company's Saturday's Voyeur will be happening tonight tonight at 6. Tickets start at $39.
Brewvies, True TV, City Weekly & Bohemian Brewery are letting you catch up on the first half of the fifth and final season of Breaking Bad before the Aug. 11 return -- two episodes every Sunday. The show starts at 8 p.m. Admission is free.
Solitude Mountain Resort will be hosting the Taste of The Wasatch all day today.
It's Funk and Soul Night with DJ Street Jesus at Bourbon House. The music starts at 9. No cover.
For the weekend's complete list of things to do, click here.