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The Secret Handshake

16 Pics Proving The Utah State Fair Was Epic

by Colin Wolf
- Posted // 2012-09-21 -

The Utah State Fair had its last hurrah Sept. 16 and if you missed it, well, you skipped what was quite possibly the most classic people-watching event of the summer. So, in an effort to showcase all the reasons you should’ve dragged your ass out there (without artsy photos of time-lapsed carousels), I've compiled 6 days of the best fair-footy possible. Bonus: Since The Salt Lake Tribune inspired me with its recent questionable paparazzi pic, I threw in a few "could be" celebrity spottings, as well. Enjoy.

1. Guy who may or may not be Stephen King wearing a country fedora.

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2. Donkeys who think they’re people. Day 14: They still haven't noticed I'm a donkey.

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3. Some kid who thinks he’s a rabbit. Silly rabbit, your paws can’t open bags.

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4. Woman confused by corn. “This is the shittiest burrito I’ve ever had.”

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5. Lindsay Lohan sightings. This was minutes before she slammed some guy with her Beamer.

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6. Inflatable ass mannequins. Because this is how people will see you when you wear these pants.

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7. A mural that punishes all murals. I want this made into a tank top and then I want the tank top tattooed to my chest.

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8. Kid Rock crushing a beer. Based on Tribune logic, it has to be him.  

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9. This. The best way to let people know you're a fister is with an informative T-shirt.

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10. Rubeus Hagrid. He's some guy from a book about wizards.

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11. Derby drivers screaming, “Are you not entertained?”

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12. The smallest penis in the valley.

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13. The biggest penis in the valley.

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14. Inadvertent anti-breastfeeding ads. We're all sinners.

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15. Steven Spielberg. Hell, he may or may not have been there.

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Twitter: @WolfColin

Photos 1-6: Mike Fuchs; 7-14: Wolf; Spielberg photo: pentagon.gov

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REPLY TO THIS COMMENT
Posted // September 22,2012 at 12:18

I can niether confirm nor deny that I was there eating a corn dog.  

 

 
 
 
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