Dear GYA, As everybody knows, homosexuality is the same thing as bestiality -- it's in the bible. Now if you don't mind, I have a busy afternoon composed of sitting in a small duck blind with bearded men and tricking ducks into thinking I want to have sex with them by making realistic duck mating calls. Anything happening this weekend as manly and straight as Duck Dynasty? - Phil Robertson
Phil, You're a poet and a scholar. Here's what's up this weekend, starting with Friday's events:
Stand-up comedian Dwayne Perkins will be at Wiseguys West Valley this evening. There's two shows, at 7:30 and 9:30. Tickets are $12.
Rapper Yazzi will be at Kilby Court tonight. Def Quo and Flight Crew are also performing. The show starts at 8. Tickets are $6.
The Depot will be hosting a solid hip-hop line-up tonight featuring Zion I, Cunninlinguists and Michael Menert. Dine Krew, Dope Thought and Burnell Washburn are also on the bill. The show starts at 9. Tickets are $15.
The Piano Guys, those two piano players who love to play the piano in the most inconvenient places in the world, will be at Energy Solutions Arena tonight. The show starts at 8. Tickets start at $28.
Dubstep duo Adventure Club will be at Park City Live. The show starts at 8 p.m. Tickets are $25.
Americana singer and guitarist Justin Townes Earle will be at The State Room this evening. Jay William Henderson is also performing. The show starts at 8. Tickets are $30.
At Canyons Resort, the first 50 skiers dressed as Santa get to ski for free! Click the link for more details.
The Winter Farmers Market will be going down at The Rio Grande Depot, starting at 10 a.m.
The Dharma Blues will be onstage at Kilby Court tonight. The show starts at 7. Tickets are $6.
DJ Street Jesus will be hosting Funk and Soul Night at Bourbon House. Admission is free. The music starts at 9.
The Geeks Who Drink Pub Quiz will be happening at Piper Down tonight at 7:30. There's no cover.
For the weekend's complete list of things to do, click here.