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Private Eye

Uphill Bill

Asking for normalcy when the opposition isn’t normal.

By John Saltas
POSTED // Feb 26,2009 - Such is the degree of nasty on their nasty meters that each year, Utah's talking heads engage in a local competitive sport trying to create newer, bigger and badder adjectives to describe certain members of the Utah State Legislature.

Private Eye

Damn Yankee

Lying to the American public is getting to be old hat.

By John Saltas
POSTED // Feb 19,2009 - Two years ago I saw just my second New York Yankees baseball game at Yankee Stadium. Its hard to get motivated to go to New York City just to watch a ballgame, but my whole family is made up of Yankee fans, so off we went. The Yankees beat the Seattle Mariners that evening, and I forget the score.

Private Eye

Love the Sinner

By John Saltas
POSTED // Feb 13,2009 - Itís a tough gig selling cars these days. Thatís bad for the bar business. All over town, people who earn their living selling cars are buying fewer cocktails at cocktail hour. If they even show up at all, that is.

Private Eye

Dyin’ in Zion

By John Saltas
POSTED // Feb 9,2009 - I walked into Port O Call for the very first time on the very first day the club opened. At the time, our offices were on Historic Main Street in Midvale, not downtown. But our back page was always sold to Mainstay Vodka, and I knew the distributor of that product Terry Nish (he of Salt Flats race-driving fame), very well.

Private Eye

Private Eye | Dyin' in Zion: Port O' Call was an anomaly in a town that yearns to be Vatican West.

By John Saltas
POSTED // Feb 3,2009 - I walked into Port O’ Call for the very first time on the very first day the club opened. At the time, our offices were on Historic Main Street in Midvale, not downtown. But our back page was always sold to Mainstay Vodka, and I knew the distributor of that product Terry Nish (he of Salt Flats race-driving fame), very well. All I really remember is that the tables had green tablecloths on th...

Private Eye

Private Eye | Nicotine Fit: Too bad Gov. Huntsman can't get off the cigarettes.

By John Saltas
POSTED // Jan 28,2009 - In years past, we were already ducking shrapnel at this point of a new session of the Utah Legislature. Going a full two days without some major legislative faux pas, ego-branded pissing match or yet another Republican threat to disembowel any and all Democrat-sponsored bills appears to be a big plus. However, with 43 days until this session ends, I’m not taking bets that this sense of harmo...

Private Eye

Private Eye | Whatsa Ute? Victory adventures on Bourbon Street

By John Saltas
POSTED // Jan 7,2009 - I lit my University of Utah football victory cigar before breakfast on Friday morning, Jan. 2. The Utes wouldn’t wallop Alabama for another eight hours or so, but the sweet smell of success emanating from The Cigar Factory on New Orleans’ Decatur Street was just too tempting. I walked past several people skillfully rolling cigars and into a humidor where a nice fellow suggested my best...

Private Eye

Private Eye | Matheson and Me: At least Jim has a nice smile and votes an awful lot.

By John Saltas
POSTED // Dec 31,2008 - Yeah, I know. I can read our comment boards, too. City Weekly is fish wrap. City Weekly makes good bird-cage liner. City Weekly has no influence, so Jim Matheson shouldn’t talk to us, anyway. City Weekly needs to be punished for being mean to Matheson. City Weekly is a rag. City Weekly isn’t a real newspaper and real journalists don’t work here. City Weekly is free—otherwis...

Private Eye

Private Eye | Christmas Cards: Holiday wishes to friends and the not-so-friendly.

By John Saltas
POSTED // Dec 24,2008 - Growing up in Bingham Canyon, I heard season’s greetings uttered in many languages besides the Queen’s English that I speak and write with to this very day. In our home, it was Kala Christougena. Our neighbors were Japanese. According to a recent e-mail I received from a great old friend who is an LDS stake president and who served his mission in Japan, I assume they said, Kurisumasu O...

Private Eye

Private Eye | Meet Him in the Muss: If there ever was a Utah Man, it was Parry Sorensen.

By John Saltas
POSTED // Dec 17,2008 - It wasn’t a good circumstance, a funeral service, but I finally saw what the football field at Rice-Eccles stadium looks like from the executive tower high above the west bleachers. It was Monday and the field was covered in snow. I guess it’s a good place to watch a football game if you don’t mind mingling with people who don’t like to mingle with the cuppa joe masses sitt...
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