Deep End | Dunk With Power: Princess Di, Anna Nicole Smith jump line in baptisms for the dead

POSTED // May 28,2008 - Baptism for the dead is once again in the news, and I, for one, don’t know what all the fuss is about. A few years ago, the Jews were mad that the Mormons were baptizing dead Jews, and now the Catholics are mad that Mormons are baptizing dead Catholics....

Deep End

Deep End | Shame Patrol: A search of Hillary’s innards comes up with only bile.

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // May 21,2008 - In recent weeks, as Mrs. Clinton tried to reinvent herself as a redneck, dropping her g’s and sprinkling her discourse with gonnas and wouldas and drawing out her flat Midwestern vowels into dipsy-doodle Deep South diphthongs, political commentators...

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Deep End | Stripped Clean: The real Hannah Montana bares the truth behind the Miley Cyrus flap

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // May 7,2008 - Hannah Montana was waiting for me on the Oasis café patio. The real Hannah Montana, not country-music has-been Billy Ray Cyrus’s daughter who’s now getting a lot of publicity for a sexy photo in this month’s Vanity Fair. People...

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Deep End | Urge to Merge: LDS and FLDS find they are not such strange bedfellows

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // Apr 30,2008 - A blockbuster merger between The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and the Fundamentalist Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will soon be announced, City Weekly has learned. Though the new name of the combined church has not been finalized,...

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Deep End | (Un)Happy Hour: Just try to get a drink when mingling with “Giants in the City”

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // Apr 23,2008 - Where was the bar? Several people were cradling wine goblets, and others were clutching highball glasses. Gin and tonic? Vodka on the rocks? Scotch and soda? Usually you don’t see so many serious drinkers at these functions. A good sign to see so...

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Deep End | Blessed & Dressed: Mitt will be president'in the fullness of time

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // Apr 16,2008 - Mitt remembers as if it were yesterday the moment he knew he would one day become president of the United States. The room in the patriarch’s chamber was stuffy, and he could feel the old man’s bony fingers intermittently squeezing his scalp,...

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Deep End | A Battle for the Ages: The gender wars were nothing compared to the epic intergenerational conflict of Obama vs. McCain

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // Apr 9,2008 - Presidential elections are always more fun when contestants are playing out some universal struggle. Kennedy versus Nixon was the classic conflict between the cool guy and the creep. Eisenhower versus Stevenson represented the recurring battle between...

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Deep End | Grave Anatomy: Watching Hillary becomes a night of the living dead

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // Apr 2,2008 - Once again, displaying her never-say-die spirit, a plucky Hillary Clinton, wearing her trademark flack jacket and steel helmet, announced yesterday that she will, if necessary, carry on her battle to become president from “beyond the grave.”...

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Deep End | Body Politic: Davis County prosecutors get a whole new charge from nude teen photos

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // Mar 19,2008 - Davis County prosecutors say they do not want to “rush to judgment” in bringing charges against the 18 teenagers who exchanged nude photographs of themselves on their cell phones. “We are spending as much time as possible poring over...

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Deep End | Brilliant Disguise: Mitt pops up in hiding'in Heber

By D.P. Sorensen

POSTED // Mar 12,2008 - For several exhilarating months, Mitt Romney was in the limelight every single day, dazzling the adoring multitude with his can-do spirit, his conservative principles and, most of all, his glorious hair. Then, suddenly, he was gone. No one thought it...