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The Ocho

Benefits of a 75-Cent Paper

By Bill Frost
Posted // May 6,2009 -

Eight benefits Salt Lake Tribune and Deseret News readers will enjoy now that daily newspaper prices have gone from 50 cents to 75 cents:

8. Lighter, more ergonomic editions that cause less strain on back.

7. Bigger, brighter “Rest of the Story Online!” icons.

6. Political-cartoon-to-Daily-Show conversion charts for those under 50.

5. Smaller, less disturbing photos of homely columnists.

4. Simplified, space-saving sports scores: “Won,” “Lost” and “Some Women Played.”

3. Increased investigative scrutiny of the Most True and Wonderful Church on Earth.

2. New streamlined Web obituaries: Twitterbituaries.

1. One less quarter jangling in the pocket to attract homeless newspaper reporters.

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