Emeril is dead. OK, not supastar Food Network Chef Emeril Lagasse himself, just his horrific self-titled NBC sitcom—insert obligatory “Bam!” joke here. Lagasse is every bit as alive ‘n’ tainted as failed post-Seinfeld alum Michael “Kramer” Richards (last season’s quickly-canceled Michael Richards Show) and Jason “Costanza” Alexander (this season’s quickly-canceled Bob Patterson). Repetition just kinda drains all the fun out of these high-profile celebrity-vehicle TV bombs, doesn’t it? Curse you, Bette Midler and Geena Davis.