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Home / Articles / Archive / Links /  Savage Love | Take My Wife, Please Page 2
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Savage Love | Take My Wife, Please Page 2

By Dan Savage
Posted // November 28,2007 -

My boyfriend and I are both in our 20s, we’re GGG, and we’ve experimented enough to know what we both like. There’s only one thing that I’d like to try that he can’t help me with: I’d like to be with a girl. He feels that if I get to be with a girl, then he should get to be with her, or another woman. I feel that any experience I have with a woman wouldn’t threaten him, as I have no interest in having a relationship with a woman. I’d be fine if he wanted to be with another man. But he has no interest in being with a guy. I know what you’re going to write: Shut up and have a threesome! We’ve talked about that, but it would be too hard for me to watch him with another girl.

This is an argument that we keep coming back to and it always ends up with us having a semiserious fight. Help us out! Wants a Girl Alone

What you’re proposing, WAGA, is basically this: "I get to do this thing I want to do (eat a little pussy) and in exchange you get to do this thing you don’t want to do (suck a little cock)." That’s hardly fair. If you’re too threatened by the idea of your boyfriend going to bed with someone besides you whom he would like to fuck, then you have to forgo bedding someone besides him whom you would like to fuck. The end.

I am a 21-year-old, attractive straight male with an identical twin brother, also straight. I’ve never understood the "twin-fetish" thing, and whenever girls mentioned it, my response was confusion and disgust. Thing is, I was at a party with my brother a week ago, and this girl stated quite plainly that she had a thing for twins and wanted to do both of us at the same time. This girl is hot—great body, fuck-me eyes, likes to take control. And so my brother and I decided that we weren’t so disgusted with the idea after all.

I have two questions: How common is this twin-fetish thing? And where’s the incest line? This girl says she wants to see my brother and me kiss, but I don’t want to do that if it crosses the incest line. A Nervous Twin

It’s amazing how quickly "confusion and disgust" at a proposed position/kink/sibling-combo-platter morphs into "comprehension and desire" when someone with come-fuck-me eyes/tits/asscheeks, etc., does the propositioning. Bill O’Reilly wants to rub falafels on your tits? You’re not interested. Milo Ventimiglia wants to rub falafels on your tits? You’re in the kitchen mashing up chickpeas in your underwear.

Anyway, how common is the twin-fetish thing? Common enough for beer and chewing-gum companies to market their products exploiting your kind, ANT, and, in a related development, common enough to have its very own porn genre. Rest assured that you and your brother are going to receive proposals like this one so long as you insist on being young and attractive and identical. (With the notable exception of Viola and Sebastian, fraternal twins aren’t nearly as compelling.)

As to where you should draw the "incest line," well, different people draw that line in different places. Personally, I feel there’s something vaguely incestuous about being in the same time zone when one of my siblings is getting it on with someone—hell, I’m uncomfortable being in the same time zone when one of my siblings is showering. So you’ll have to look inside yourself, ANT, and then look at the outside of that smoking-hot girl again, before you can decide where to draw that line.

But I’m sure I speak for everyone out there reading this column when I say this: If you decide to go ahead with this threesome, whether it includes incestuous twin tongue kisses or not, we all wanna see the video on XTube.

Download Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at www.thestranger.com/savage. Contact: mail@savagelove.net

 

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