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5 Spot

Comedian David Cross

By Brian Staker
Posted // September 23,2009 -

David Cross, comedian and film/TV star, is best known for his role as the never-nude, unconsciously double-entendre slinging Dr. Tobias Funke in the TV show Arrested Development, and also as one of the stars of the groundbreaking sketch show Mr. Show in the early ’90s, which has influenced a whole generation of comedians. Unfortunately, since the demise of Arrested Development, Cross has actually been reduced to the indignity of writing a book (chortle). The autobiographically-titled I Drink For a Reason (Grand Central) is full of nuggets of humorous wisdom, from his detail of the soulcrushing effects of Valentine‘s Day in “A Non-Sponsored Look at Holidays In America“ to the uplifting “The Five People You Will Meet In Limbo.” He will be reading and signing the book Monday, Sept. 28 at 4 p.m. at The King’s English Bookstore, and he’ll deliver the standup that evening 8 p.m. at In the Venue.

Why did you write the book? Was it a desperation move?
My cousin was kidnapped, and part of the ransom demands was that I write a humorous book of 250-275 words, published by Thanksgiving. He was released by his captor, a lady in Stuttgart, Germany, who wanted the zoning laws changed so that she could operate a commercial bakery in her own home.

Is it all downhill (by “it,” I mean your career) after Arrested Development, or is it all gravy?
Yes, any subsequent events in my professional and personal career, including the disintegration of my marriage and the death of our child. And it’s also been gravy, quite literally.

What can Salt Lakers expect from your “comedic stylings”?
People who attend book readings are more literate and sophisticated, while standup comedy audiences are more primitive—like cavemen banging on sticks and rocks and trying to create fire. I’ll pull out all the stops. I’ll tear Salt Lake City a new asshole!

Are there any plans to make a movie out of the book, and, if so, who would play you?
Ideas are being tossed around. A young Kathy Griffin or the horse from Seabiscuit. I might add that the book is completely edible, is tasty and contains no transfats.

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Posted // September 23,2009 at 14:29

This guy and Brian Regan and Patton Oswalt are the funniest people in the universe right now.

Cross appears on Bill Maher's show from time to time and if there was ever a "dangerous" comic since Lenny Bruce and Richard Pryor, it's Cross. I start laughing as soon as he opens his mouth and he always delivers a killer punchline about the time you start wondering,"Where the Hell you goin' with this?"

Last Friday on Maher's show, Cross started down the road of a potentially deadly-sounding, rascist rant and just when the stunned audience exhaled, he pulled it off for a laugh.

I have no doubt that he spontaneously answered that first question totally on the fly.