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Home / Articles / · Archive / News & Columns /  Lake Effect: Lohan Behold
News & Columns

Lake Effect: Lohan Behold

By Brandon Burt
Posted // October 10,2007 -
The stars are out again in Utah—or at least Lindsay Lohan is. America’s Darling warmed Utah hearts by choosing our state, out of all 50, to serve her DUI rehab over the summer. (Ordinary mortals get a year in jail and have to stay where they’re put. Perhaps it’s time for a “prison choice” voucher program.)

Now, Lohan has announced—in an OK! magazine interview—that she will stay in Utah to avoid temptation. Obviously, the tourism board hasn’t got to her yet, or she’d know this is just the kind of image we’re trying to avoid.

We’re not clean and wholesome and temptation-free. There’s plenty of booze here. And drugs, too. Why, I’m totally baked right now, as I’m writing this. Check it out: What if the whole universe were the size of the period at the end of the last sentence? Whoa! There is no period at the end of this sentence. Whoa!!!
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REPLY TO THIS COMMENT
Posted // October 18,2007 at 12:43 This by far is the best article I have ever read, I want to read more...Whoa! :) Thank you for your sense of humor!

 

 
 
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