Edit This! 

For the sixth time in 25 years, it’s my pleasure to introduce a new editor of City Weekly. It would be the seventh, but I never introduced myself way back when. I just was. Truthfully, it’s not always a pleasure, either. It’s just being polite. However, this time it’s beyond polite, and is indeed a pleasure to herald a new chapter for a seven-year City Weekly veteran whom we are all enamored of.

Jerre Wroble is the new editor of City Weekly. Her ascendancy from managing editor follows the recent departure of former editor Holly Mullen, to whom our best wishes are extended. That is sincere, not just being polite, by the way. Truthfully, such words are not always entirely sincere. This time they are. Sincerely.

For those of you who like to update Wikipedia, Jerre is a native Utahn. She attended the appropriate local Catholic schools, then at a young age moved with her family to Casper, Wyo., where she graduated from high school and very nearly met Dick Cheney. She is a graduate from the mass-communication department of the University of Utah, with an emphasis on news editorial. Jerre spent most of the 1980s and ’90s in Alaska, where she really did meet Sarah Palin (pre-Governor), did some newspapering and never became a crab fisherman. She returned to Utah in 2000.

Jerre is among the diminishing number of employees who worked at our former office on 400 South—which was partially housed in the soon-to-be-demolished Shubrick building. Thus, like some of us, she’s a bit sad today knowing that the tables in Port O’ Call where we did so much work and pleasure are about to be auctioned off. I’ve known Jerre pretty well for these seven years—she’ll get over it.

And she’ll return to what is one of her City Weekly trademarks—she’ll outwork everyone around her, she’ll keep everyone around her on task, she’ll organize the disorganized, she’ll keep her smile and wit, and she’ll return tomorrow to do it again. Jerre keeps the trains running on time. Even when I’ve heard her complain, she complains with a smile. I don’t know how she does that. All I know is that we’re happy she’s our smiling stationmaster. Congratulations, Jerre, from all of us at City Weekly.

Green Zone, Red Zone
Utah state Sen. John Valentine continues his assault on common sense and drinkers. Valentine represents Orem, so what can one really expect? Now, he’s after Utah restaurants, which have barriers of some type on their bar counters—the Zion Curtain—in order to prevent a bartender from serving a drink over the bar. A Utah server has to walk around the bar to serve a drink to a customer, or a server can deliver the drink.

Valentine thinks that’s too much skin—after all, his mother’s children, himself included, can still see a drink being poured or mixed. Somewhere, possibly even in Utah County, Valentine witnessed a bartender grab a bottle of booze, put some of it in a glass, add a mixer, give it a stir and send it off to a customer. Viewing that lurid display of liquid pornography has affected the man’s brains. Now, he’s dumber than he was before. Not only did he fail to note whether or not the bartender licked the straw—clearly another egregious moral violation—he said that restaurants shouldn’t be bars (they aren’t), that kids need protection from such visual abuse, and he’s going to do something about it.

Valentine’s “something” is a Senate bill requiring all restaurants to erect a 10-foot wall to block persons from seeing alcohol stored, prepared and served. Oh, well, you say, you can still drink your drink in front of him? Uh-uh. Valentine also wants to make it illegal to appear to be drunk. Wanna bet he has the cops on speed dial in case he sees you drinking?

Here’s what we need: If a place serves liquor, paint it red. If it doesn’t, paint it green. Valentine and his liquor-leech cronies can have the greens—with the crappy food and high prices derived of not having drinkers subsidize his service, food quality and price. Leave the reds alone.

We Back You Up
Apparently, the gay boycott of Ken Garff Automotive Group is over. The details aren’t clear, but some gay leaders say it’s OK to shop there again. So go ahead. I’m just happy it didn’t cost me any drinks.