Dad Who Opposed Adoption Tries to Visit Adoptive Parents--and His Child

John Wyatt always wanted his child--but can't even get a visit.

Posted // September 10,2010 -

John Wyatt flew to Utah to appear before the Utah Supreme Court Thursday in hopes of dissolving the adoption of his child to a Utah family, which he always opposed.

Wyatt, 22, of Dumphries, Virg., was featured in City Weekly's July cover story, “Some Call It Kidnapping.” He and several unmarried fathers from across the country are angry at Utah adoption laws they say unfairly cut them off from raising their own children. Several adoption experts in Utah and elsewhere say that Utah's laws most readily eliminate an unmarried father's rights to his child.

At issue in his Supreme Court hearing are conflicting rulings from Utah and Virginia courts. Virginia has issued a final ruling that Wyatt should have custody of baby Emma; Utah courts, thus far, have found in favor of the adoptive family. “What we're shooting for is [for the Supreme Court to rule] that Utah doesn't have jurisdiction … and any future proceedings should happen in Virginia,” Wyatt's attorney Joshua Peterman said after the hearing.

Wyatt's legal complaint cites the Parental Kidnapping Prevention Act, which determines proper jurisdiction for parental custody cases. Whether that law applies to Wyatt's case is one issue to be decided by the Utah Supreme Court. A decision could come at any time, but is likely to take several months.

After his court hearing, City Weekly accompanied Wyatt to his next appointment: A special delivery of a stuffed animal, balloon and card, delivered to the Canyon Rim home where his biological daughter—19 months old—now lives.

“I'm going to the see the Zarembinskis, the kidnappers who have my child,” Wyatt said. “But I'm not sure if they're going to let me see her.”

He said that with some irony, knowing they almost certainly would not. The two-state court battle Wyatt has lodged has continued alongside the national media campaign that Wyatt—and other fathers who support him—have coordinated to change Utah's laws. He's been their star: Wyatt has appeared on on The Dr. Phil Show, was featured in the Washington Post, and after many months of feeling ignored by Utah's media, Wyatt is pleased his case has now been featured on television and both daily newspapers (see here, here, here, here and here). Dateline NBC also accompanied Wyatt on his visit to the Zarembinskis' home for a future program.

Before driving to the Zarembinskis' home, Wyatt stopped at the Flower Patch near the Matheson Courthouse where the Supreme Court hearing occurred. He was accompanied by his mother, Jeri Wyatt, and friend Tanya O'Dea of Wyoming, whose husband, Cody O'Dea, also battled Utah adoption laws for his child from a previous relationship, but lost in a 3-2 decision (pdf) before the Utah Supreme Court in 2009.

Wyatt picked out a pink stuffed elephant and pink balloon with the words “I Love You” on it. He wrote the name “Emma” in big letters on the card. “Did you know they changed her name to Gabrielle?” Jeri Wyatt asked. “[Writing Emma on the card] will make them mad.”

With a dog barking from the backyard of the Zarembinski's home, Wyatt took his gift package to the front door, knocked several times, but no one answered. He left the package on the porch, but wasn't finished.

“Somebody's got to have answers,” O'Dea said. “Just start knocking on everybody's door. I would.” O'Dea said information provided by neighbors could help Wyatt contact his daughter—if he loses in court—when she turns 18 and may wish to know her biological parents. A recent picture, for example, could be put on the Internet and help lead the child to find Wyatt, O'Dea said.

Wyatt knocked on several neighbors' doors. One neighbor told him both Zarembinskis work and often her grandparents watch her. That was all he learned.

The Wyatts returned to Virginia Thursday. Soon, Wyatt will urge a Virginia court to find the Zarembinskis in contempt for not returning his child to him.

The Zarembinskis were unable to be reached for comment. They did not appear in court and their previous phone number has been disconnected.

“I wish John would have been able to see his child,” Jeri Wyatt said. “I think it's really sad that he's got this child he's never seen and nobody will let him see her. … I would love to see my granddaughter. We love her.”

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REPLY TO THIS COMMENT

anonymous

Posted // September 9,2010 at 20:46

If he "looses" in court? Wow, great jounalism....it is "loses."

These people's tactics sure aren't going to get them anywhere. If Wyatt LOSES I seriously doubt his daughter's parents will want to have any contact with him if he tries to strong arm his way into their neighborhood. I'd be calling the police and having him arrested for stalking if I were them.

As for this Odea woman, why is she even there? She isn't a biological parent of a child placed for adoption. How does she even know that thes kids will come looking for their birth parents? These people are creepy!

Tanya O'dea

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:13 - Oh my gosh people....First off, let me help a few of you out with some facts. 1) I went to Utah with a family member, stayed in a motel with her. I wasn't by any means TREKKING to Utah with another man. 2)My Husband was taking care of my children, because he is a GREAT dad. 3)He isn't pursuing anymore because he lost in the Utah Supreme Court last year after spending close to 50 grand on attorney fees. Most people don't have the money to fight that far or appeal to the US Supreme Court. 4)Cody's Mom died last year of Stage 4 Melanoma. So you have some BALLS to bring her up and say that she is the reason he pursued anything. 5)Knocking on someone's door is hardly stalking. Lastly, I would be a little more worried about what is going on in the state of Utah, then what I am doing. You people make me sick.

Jagged One

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:24 - What is creepy is that the father has no rights. Typical Utah thinking.

Kirsten

Posted // September 10,2010 at 10:29 - If Gabrielle's birth mother "regrets her decision and is back together with Mr. wyatt" as he claimed...why isn't SHE standing in the street with her arms folded as he knocks on Gabrielle's parents door?

Anonymous

Posted // September 10,2010 at 23:03 - What is creepy about a father wanting to see his child who he never gave up for adoption? Seriously? If my daughter was given up for adoption without my consent I would do the same thing. What does it matter who is with him or who is not with him? He doesn't have any rights. What should he do just forget about his daughter and act like she never was born? Come on, do you not have a heart? Can you not see his point of view. This why people outside of Utah look at us like idiots. Who could be against this? Typical Utahns.

Michelle

Posted // September 13,2010 at 13:19 - It's these not thes...typos happen all the time. I agree, their tactics aren't getting them anywhere, he should just allow the system to work, hopefully. I think it's wonderful that the biological father wants his child, you don't see much of that anymore. He needs to take in to consideration the bond his daughter has with the adoptive parents, and them with her. Bottom line he's the father, and wants a relationship with his daughter he should be able to have that. It's too bad that they can't work something out, where they're all the lives of the girl.

anonymous 4

Posted // September 13,2010 at 13:24 - Here's a novel idea. Before you bring children into this world make sure you love the person and marry them first. Then you don't have to fight for your own child. Too many people make the lifetime commitment to have a child with a person they don't see worthy of marrying in the first place.

Posted // September 19,2010 at 14:21 - What's "jounalism"? If you're going to be a god damned spelling Nazi, at least have the personal integrity to make sure that everything you spell is correct.

John

Posted // September 28,2010 at 23:37 - Tanya, Why did you come to Utah instead of your husband? he is the birth father after all. It seems like you should have stayed home with your children and he should have been the one here supporting john wyatt. all the posts on this site about this subject are from you and none from him. Maybe he could get over what happened to him if you wouldn't spend so much time harping on it.

Tanya ODea

Posted // September 29,2010 at 07:35 - John- Not that it is any of your business, but, my Husband was home working and couldn't get off work. He is very supportive of John Wyatt and all the other birth fathers that have had their children taken away. He will NEVER get over losing his daughter. He is just as passionate as I am about changing the laws in Utah and letting birth fathers raise their own children than I am. Why are you worried about what I am doing anyway? A lot more corrupt stuff going on then me leaving my Husband and children for one night. Might wanna check that out. P.S. I won't stop harping about it until it stops.

Ada

Posted // October 2,2010 at 08:40 - Definitely work on changing the laws if you feel they are wrong. A national Putative Father registry is probably a good idea. I don't think just signing up on a registry should be all a man must do to prove paternity and establish rights, but it is a good start. As for your husband, Mrs O'Dea, while of course, he will never get over losing his child, my feelings are, unless you are going forward, you are going backward. I hope he is receiving counseling to help him. Forgiveness is what God asks us to do, and it can be very liberating. His case was lost. Perhaps he needs to forgive, but not forget. Continue his activism but move on with his life. Concentrate on his children at home and continue being a good father to them.

Posted // October 2,2010 at 10:07 - In your first response you said your husband was home with your children, now you say he couldn't get off work. he won't get over it if you won't let it go. his baby has a great life, isn't that enough? why are you so intent on hurting children by ripping them from the only home they've ever known? your husband's situation is completely different than wyatt's, we feel for him as he was deceived, but wyatt wasn't, he knew the birth mother's plans and didn't act when he claims he did or the baby couldn't have left Virginia. I think his claims of Virginia giving him custody are false, there are laws in place and people can't just take babies and walk away as he claims occurred.

Posted // October 3,2010 at 10:03 - John, you need to understand that O'dea's side of the story isn't the truth. Her husband knew all along that the mother wanted to place the baby for adoption. Yes he was told there was a miscarriage, but he found out that there was still a pregnancy in enough time to act. He DID not block an adoption in Montana, no paperwork was ever filed in Montana. He did get on the putative father registry in Wyoming, however that does not "block an adoption" it gives a man notification, which he certainly had. Also, his paperwork in Utah, he left for a "friend" to file...the friend didn't do so.I think something as important as that, I would want to do myself to make sure it was done. All this can be found in court documents. They also claim they would do "anything" in order to have contact with the adoptive family, but refused to conform to a small request. They play the victim very well, but refuse to take any responsibility for the way their case ended. They have even attempted to bribe others to perform illegal activities in order to get their way. I don't have a lot of sympathy for someone who harresses and continues to harras the birth family through passive/aggresive means. Someday perhaps they will realize life isn't all about them and getting what they want and then maybe they will get to have some contact with the child.

Posted // October 3,2010 at 20:41 - What was the small request that Cody was supposed to comply to? Oh yeah, the request was....If you sign over your rights, you can have ONE picture of your daughter. NEVER was there talk of an open adoption with the adoptive parents. Playing victim? Right...Once again, BM in the case (since I am harrassing her as usual, I will continue to leave her name out)is put upon a pedestal. Funny thing is, hasn't she had another child out of wedlock? Last time I checked, Cody has moved on. Cody has forgiven. All he wants is a relationship with his daughter, I don't think that should be too much to ask. When would BM have told Cody about the adoption? If he wouldn't have found out she was still pregnant he would have been kept in the dark. How can you make him out as the bad person here? BM lied and said the baby had died, hid her pregnancy, then once he had blocked the adoption in WY, she ran down to Utah and deceived him once again by saying that he would pay child support until the child was 18. Not to mention, what kind of person, refuses a picture of a Grandmother's first born grandchild when they are on their deathbed. Seriously, it's pretty disgusting how you people sit upon your pedestal and pretend you did nothing wrong.

Auntie M

Posted // October 4,2010 at 06:20 - On the contrary....first of all "you people?" Trust me, no one is putting anyone on a pedestal. And so what if BM has had another child out of wedlock? What does that have to do with any of this? So did you. And according to you and yours, there is nothing wrong with that? Correct? The request I am referring to is one that the child's picture not be plastered all over the Internet as a poster child for your little cause. This request was made after your husband's case was lost in the Utah Supreme Court, by the adoptive family. Cody did not block an adoption in Wyoming. Read the court documents. But hey, that is your cute little story, so stick to it, even if it is wrong. Cody has moved on? Really? Then why can't you? Especially since you really have nothing to do with any of this. You came into the game how long after the child was born? A year and half, two years? You don't know the mother, or the family, yet you can continue to harass them. How many people have you offered to pay to break into the family's home to steal photos? And after over 3 years of not wanting to hear a word from the mother, you then contact her and ask her to supply a picture, after dragging her name through the mud for YEARS! Well guess what? It isn't her place to provide you with a picture,the legal parents have the right to do that if they choose. And seeing the way you, Tanya, encourage stalking, harassing and illegal behavior to get what you want, I bet that will be a long time coming. I find your behavior a mite disgusting myself. You know the old saying, you catch more flies with honey than you do vinegar? You just might want to think about that a little bit.

Posted // October 4,2010 at 08:08 - Auntie M- First off, you might want to get your facts straight. For one, I have been with Cody since HIS daughter was 5 months old. Secondly, I was the one harassed by HER mother, for having a child out of wedlock. So that is the reason that is is entertaining that she has a child another child out of wedlock. Her mother threw everyone ones name through the mud here. Even my three year old son at the time. Last and not least, WE are the ones that contacted Larry Jenkins after the case was over and asked for an open adoption. Which obviously we didn't get. It wasn't until December, Cody contacted Ashley and Larry Jenkins to ask for a picture to give his Mother so she could die with at least a picture of her granddaughter. We agreed to take down the website and to not put any picture up of her. So, get your facts straight. They haven't contacted us once, Cody was the one contacting them. If you want to see copies of any of this feel free to write us on the website. I won't be congesting Jesse's great articles arguing with you because you are making your own assumptions. Cody has EVERY right to be a part of his daughter's life. He did everything in his power to protect his rights. Oh by the way, if he hadn't protected his rights in WY and MT, why didn't she give the child up there? If you know so much, you'd know she had started the adoption process with an adoption agency in MT. Once again, you can find that on the website.

Posted // October 7,2010 at 23:22 - Auntie M. This is very interesting information, the O'dea situation isn't at all what Tanya has claimed when she was on TV in Salt Lake. I really wondered about it, what so many people don't understand is that if the adoption paperwork wasn't handled properly from the very beginning by the adoption agency, the baby wouldn't be with the adoptive parents in the first place. Cody and John just didn't do what they needed to do....if they ever really wanted to in the first place. Personally I think it's John's mother and Tanya pushing both of these cases. It's a good thing Tanya didn't get a picture of the baby or it would be all over the internet, just like poor Emma's is.

anon1

Posted // October 11,2010 at 16:22 - illegal or not I do think both the bio mom of the o'dea baby and the adoption agency behaved very unethically. both were very aware that bio father really wanted to raise the baby and they did everything they could, running to another jurisdiction, saying confusing and misleading things to the father, etc. Even if it's not illegal as of now (though I'd be interested in a federal courts view on it), it's certainly very poor behavior IMO and the law should be changed to prevent it from happening. Sadly, in Utah, I don't see that happening. But a law that considers "I'm going to make you pay child support for 18 years and you will never see the baby" notice of an adoption that sets the clock ticking is, in my opinion, very, very wrong, and I think it's very sad that a legislature would think that is ok.

Posted // October 11,2010 at 16:24 - illegal or not I feel the bio mom and the agency behaved very poorly and unethically in the o'dea case. both were very, very aware the bio father wanted very badly to raise the baby and did everything they could to confuse him, mislead him, and run to another jurisdiction to try and cut off his rights. and any law that considers "you'll pay child support for 18 years and never see her" notice of an adoption is pretty freaking corrupt. It's sad a legislature really thinks that level of dishonesty should be rewarded.

Posted // September 9,2010 at 23:22

The O'Dea woman was there to support her friend. She may not be a biological parent to a child placed for adoption, but she is a Step-Parent. If I were you I would stop worrying about grammatical errors and get a life. Especially when you spelled journalism wrong. IDIOT. There is NOTHING creepy about a man trying to find his biological child.

RMH

Posted // September 10,2010 at 00:55 - you know what's creepy? going to another state and stealing a child then fleeing with the child to circumvent the laws of that state. they should be ashamed of themselves and they will have to answer someday for what they've done.

Posted // September 10,2010 at 07:04 - She isn't a step-parent. She is just married to a sperm donor. One who admitted on the radio that he wouldn't be pursuing any of this if his mommy and his wife weren't pushing him. Sounds like they have bigger balls then he does. These people are stalking, and yes, I hope the parents of Gabriella get restraining orders against these crazies.

Posted // September 10,2010 at 07:06 - Where were Mrs O'dea's 2 biological children while she was trekking off to Utah with a man other than her husband to stalk these poor people?

anon

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:00 - they aren't her parents, they are kidnappers. They took her from Virginia in defiance of Virginia laws. Virginia law required his consent and Virginia is where the mother gave her up for adoption! you can't just grab a child and run to another state to get away from the law.

Jagged 1

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:26 - I AGREE

JOSEPH

Posted // September 10,2010 at 10:27 - He should have right's to choose who adopts his baby. He must meet criteria of course. Income ect! It's a sad story. Sounds like dirty politics to me. Maybe Ron Yengich Lawyer can help?

Posted // September 10,2010 at 00:15

I think those adoptive parents should get a restraining order.

Scott Bangerter

Posted // September 10,2010 at 08:51 - First of all this isn't kidnapping. The biological mother placed the child for adoption. No laws were broken at the time of the adoption. The fact is that biological fathers have minimal rights in these situations. However, that doesn't make the Zarembinksis' criminals or "kidnappers". Utah adoption laws are setup to prevent situations where the parent(s) placing the child for adoption can't have "buyers remorse" and play a yo-yo game with a child. I wish the Zarembinksis good luck.

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:01 - except the problem with that argument is the child was actually born in another state (and it was in the other state that the mother signed the adoption papers), and in that state the father fufilled the requirements to stop the adoption. And they snuck the baby out of state ANYWAY. Do you honestly think its ok to steal a child from another state and then run to Utah in hopes of being protected?

Rebeckah

Posted // September 11,2010 at 22:45 - Yes, actually SEVERAL laws were broken. First and foremost, the kidnappers removed this infant from her home state without permission from BOTH of her parents. In Virginia that is a violation of their adoption laws. Secondly, they have attempted to use their kidnapping of Emma as a leverage to illegally change the state with jurisdiction over Emma's custody. I very much hope this case goes all the way to the United States Supreme Court and Utah gets a much needed swatting on a federal level. Their actions and laws are revolting and disgusting. How DARE they pretend to be a state with "family values" when they destroy families at a whim?

Posted // September 10,2010 at 07:26

having been through a very similar situation, i have to say that one day wyatt will learn that he will get a lot further with visitation from the adoptive couple (no matter the outcome or duration of the case) when he decides to be mature enough to do things that don't intentionally "make them mad."

and i am sorry, but if ANYONE in the world started knocking door to door in my neighborhood and asking questions about my family, i would immediately call the police and file and restraining order.

this kid is a joke. i don't care how much quality of sub par press he recieves, after listening to a live stream of thurday's court hearing, it is CLEAR that wyatt did not protect his rights.

protect your rights, buddy. it is YOUR responsibility. NO ONE should be legally responsible to remind you of those rights, just like no one did that for the birth mother. she found those out all on her own. BRAVO to her for choosing the life that she wanted for her child when the sperm donor was NO WHERE to be found. a pregnancy is NINE months, buddy. get involved before the last minute.

i guess he should have spent more time in school listening in his sex ed class instead of calling in bomb threats so that he could skip school. www.pwcgov.com/docLibrary/PDF/006632.pdf

loser. i don't care how many pink elephants you buy and how much propaganda is thrown out, it doesn't make you a dad. i hope he loses--and after the smack down the judge gave his attorney in the closing arguments on thursday, it looks pretty likely.

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:04 - he protected his rights in virginia and that should be what mattered! you aren't just allowed under federal law to go to another state to get around custody laws. You honestly think it should be legal to go to another state, find a baby that state wouldn't allow you to adopt, and sneak it to another state against the wishes of a parent who has legal rights to their child? really? Wow. Just wow. Virginia was Emma's home at the time her mother signed the adoption papers and you just can't get around that by kidnapping her to another state. When you go to another state you have to follow the laws of that state! and the "adoptive" kidnappers did not do that!

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:06 - oh, and if he loses you bet this will be going to federal court and it won't be pretty. Federal judges don't take kindly to states ignoring federal law. I suggest you read up on parental kidnapping and uniform child custody law.

Posted // September 11,2010 at 22:49 - You're kidding, right? He filed paperwork within DAYS of his child's birth. He tried to see her the day she was born. Why are you lying about this? What is your stake in this you coward hiding behind "anonymous"? The kidnappers of Emma will be lucky NOT to face federal charges for their actions. Personally, I hope they do. They kidnapped Emma in violation of the laws of Virigina and they deserve to pay the price for that. You and your lies disgust me!

tiffany

Posted // September 13,2010 at 15:22 - I agree that the parents in ut should get a restraining order. What about their rights? He is violating them and invading their privacy! They seem to be the only ones thinking of little Emma, her biological dad just seems like he is in it now for the media attention.

Alyssa D

Posted // September 13,2010 at 22:27 - This guy is a choke. The kid would better off without him. Get your facts straight people he didn't try immediatly to get her back. He waited. He let GABI'S parents do all the work. Now he's going to be the kidnapper. Don't knock up random chicks and this stuff won't happen

re: Alyssa

Posted // September 14,2010 at 06:49 - Actually Alyssa...maybe you should do your homework, he filed 5 days before the Adoptive parents did ANYTHING. Not to mention he won custody last summer of EMMA. Did you see the house that Emma lives in, or the neighborhood? GHETTO. Have you seen John Wyatt's house? Not to mention the fact that Emma is being raised by her Grandma while her Mother and Father both work? Sounds like you need to do some research sweety, and in the meantime, get a grip.

Posted // September 14,2010 at 06:50 - Oh and one more thing, she wasn't a random chick....they had dated for many years. They are still close friends. The birth mother feels horrible for what she did, she was coerced by her parents and the adoption agency. JUST THOUGHT YOU SHOULD KNOW!

Posted // September 15,2010 at 01:04 - @ Tiffany "What about their rights?" What rights? They kidnapped his child. They should be in jail. "He is violating them and invading their privacy!" I repeat THEY STOLE HIS CHILD!!! "They seem to be the only ones thinking of little Emma, her biological dad just seems like he is in it now for the media attention." If they were thinking of Emma then they wouldn't have kidnapped her in the first place. They knew he wanted her, they knew the law said they had to notify him, they took the baby and ran. What kind of a human being are you to criticize a father for trying to do right by his child. What kind of monsters does the LDS faith produce anyway?

craig

Posted // September 15,2010 at 10:09 - @ Rebeckah I feel for all people involved in this situation it is very sadening and heart wrenching. I happen to be of the LDS faith and I'm confussed as to why religion is being brought into this? You should find out more about the religion and the people before you start condeming us all. Please don't lump all of us into one batch because you may have had a bad experience with one. You should also check out Texas laws on adoption, Utah isn't the only state like this. There are a lot of states that don't have laws regarding adoption at all. Again I feel for Mr Wyatt and the couple raising this little girl. Take your anger out with the birth mom and the agency and not the LDS faith.

Posted // September 17,2010 at 09:08 - @ Craig, I responded to you but apparently clicked the wrong button. It's on one of the last pages.

Posted // September 10,2010 at 08:55

My family is from Utah, and all of my extended family is from there. It makes me SICK that this is allowed to happene in a state that I do love so much. Why shouldn't a father have equal rights when it comes to HIS child? Why does he have NO say at all? And then to attack him personally because you saw something on TV? WOW. And to go after Tanya because she is a woman who is standing up for something she believes in? Wake up people. What is going on in Utah is WRONG. Your state has a reputation and if I were you I wouldn't be too proud of it, I know I'm not.

anonymous2

Posted // September 10,2010 at 09:57 - The most critical concern at this point is this little girl. At 19 months she would be inconsolable to be ripped from the arms of security and taken from the only parents she has ever known. I have grandchildren that age and YES she would be deeply affected. Besides, what kind of a Dad would this sperm donor be when he purposely writes "Emma" on the card to "make them mad", calls them "kidnappers"---does he work? how would he care for her? drop her off in a baby warehouse to be cared for by strangers? Poor little soul--for her sake leave her in the only stable environment she has ever known, and let "Daddy" go make another baby somewhere else. Just a note....this is why you get married folks, instead of having recreational sex. Women are so foolish to give away everything and have no rights. If this guy wanted the child, he had 9 months to get married and offer some security to the woman he slept with. At this point, leave the little girl in a secure environment. This dude is a total stranger to her!

Anony

Posted // September 10,2010 at 10:07 - The guy had unprotected sex and a girl got pregnant. For the mother to have thought of the best interest of her child,kudos to her. It takes alot of courage to make the right choice. Where was the sperm doner during all of this. Come on people tell the Irresponsible father to get on with his live. He seems to be just after a quick buck and attention.

re: anonymous 2

Posted // September 10,2010 at 10:14 - Your completely right. The concern is EMMA. (Which by the way, is her name on the birth certificate, which I have seen with my own eyes and also includes John Wyatt's name on it!) Sperm donor? Seriously....Sperm Donors don't go to every doctor appointment with the mother. A sperm donor wouldn't still be friends witht he mother who is responsible for the theft of his child. A quick buck? Are you smoking crack? Do you know how much a fight like this costs? Getting HIS daughter is the only thing he cares about. If the Adoptive Parents gave a damn about that girl they would have returned her to her birth father instead of jumping the state lines with her. He won temporary custody last summer and permanent custody in December. There is no one to blame except the Adoptive Parents for the damage that may be done to EMMA. Emma will be fine with counseling and a great biological family. How many memories do you have from when you were 19 months old? On another note, what would you do if one of your Grandchildren were taken from you?

Tony

Posted // September 10,2010 at 15:09 - The court system in Utah should be ashamed of itself for allowing this to happen. The fact that what the Zarembinski's did was legal is an outright shame on the legal system... not neccessarily on the Zarembinski's. Unless, of course, they were purposely using the state of Utah and its ridiculous laws as a hideout so Mr. Wyatt could not legally reach them. Fathers have NO rights in Utah. This is a well known fact. The government here is waging a legal war on fathers. My son's mother has been allowed to lock him all alone in her home every day after school for years despite my desire to care for him. The legal system, Judges, DCFS, the police, the DA... they all ONLY support the custodial parent's rights... and those rights are assumed to be WOMEN'S rights... not men's. The system is simply SEXIST!

anonymous3

Posted // September 11,2010 at 23:12 - Tony not true my ex-wife and her parents took my child from the state of Wy. disappeared for 13 years. After her parents died she ended up in Wa.. Tried to get me to pay child support and still not let me see my son. I got my parental rights back because of the state of Ut. Each case is different. The reason that Ut. got jurisdiction was because when I filed the paperwork here there was no other court with jurisdiction. So the state of Ut. did stand up for this fathers rights.

victim

Posted // September 12,2010 at 10:01 - I think that Utah's DCFS has poor judgement of "Adoption is the answer". Seemingly enough there must be more demand for children than children. If it is a situation that is best for the child-Adoption is a greaty thing. Utah has many cases of ripping and tearing apart families. I'm 1 of those mothers. My youngest 18 months. Sold for sure. My case worker was Cruella Deville and on a mission. If my children were 12, 13, and 15. No one would want any part of this quick fix. I feel that there are well off people that will do anything to have a "Baby". Motives are not always clean and can be very evil. It's is just conversation until something like this is your reality. When they try to play "GOD" and the D.A. is doing air high fives in a court room for another win is Just Wrong. I was different, not a single mom but not legally married.

Posted // September 13,2010 at 06:45 - Big deal! Another kid is just a hump away. What the hell does he want with this vagina dropping anyway. Getting up all hours of the night tending to some screaming ass duty geyser? No thanks

Gavin

Posted // September 17,2010 at 23:01 - So no one should "personally attack" John Wyatt because of something they saw on TV and no one should "go after" Tanya O'Dea??? But it's ok to "personally attack" and "go after" the adoptive parents and say things about them that are untrue. John Wyatt can say anything he wants people to believe just to make them think he's wonderful. It just amazes me that people fall for it. He says he filed within the time allowed, but how do we know if he really did? There's no documentation verifying that, if there were, the case probaby wouldn't be before the Utah Supreme Court. Until last week, John Wyatt never stepped foot in Utah, yet he comes to town with a sob story and everybody acts like they've known him forever and believes everything he says. What's he going to say..I screwed up and didn't do what I had 9 months to do but don't hold that against me??? What do you know about him? What kind of guy is he? If you know him, please enlighten those of us who don't, but have minds of our own and don't believe everything some guy on TV tells us. Obviously the birth mother, who has known him since the second grade, knew he wouldn't make a good father which is why she placed the baby for adoption. She's the one who made contact with the Utah adoption agency, they didn't contact her, so why crucify the adoptive parents? Which brings up another question....why does John Wyatt know where they live??? Tanya admits she doesn't know where her husband's biological child lives. That definitely wouldn't be common knowledge in an adoption, actually the adoptive parents' last name isn't common knowledge. Makes me wonder how he obtained that info. To Anonymous2 and Anony, I completely agree with you both. To the reply to Anonymous2, how cold hearted and cruel can you be? Why place a child in a situation where she's going to need counseling in the first place??? It doesn't matter if there are memories at 19 months of age or not, the trauma that she would experience would be horrendous!!! What a horrible thing to say, she's not a puppy, she's a human being who has been with her adoptive parents since she was born. To take her from that environment and place her with strangers, who may or may not be "great" and then drag her off to counseling so she'll be "fine", is a disgusting thing to suggest.

Rebecca

Posted // September 18,2010 at 04:09 - so if someone who wanted a baby kidnapped your newborn and you didn't find them for a couple of years, you'd just leave the child there to avoid upsetting them? That's a very poor argument to use since it basically legitimizes kidnapping for the purpose of obtaining a child to raise.

Posted // September 18,2010 at 14:09 - Gavin-Do you have children? What extent would you go to find your child if it were taken away from you? You could never imagine in a million years what something like this can do to a person. Depression, anxiety, and a partial stroke are just a few to name in my Husband's case. Not to mention the financial part of fighting a fight like this. My Husband had no information about his child because he was told his child had died. John on the other hand, has gotten all the information from the birth mother. What exactly do you want to attack John and me for? What exactly are we doing wrong? I know John personally and I can tell you one thing, he loves his daughter with all of his heart. He is a good person. If he weren't, he wouldn't still be friends with the birth mother who gave his child away. I also saw with my very own eyes Emma's birth certificate which has John's name on it. Not to mention, the paperwork stating he filed paperwork 5 days before the adoptive parents filed anything. He wasn't just a sperm donor. He went to every appointment and asked the birth mother to marry him. He was ready to be a father, unfortunately she wasn't ready to be a mother. It's a no win situation for father's. You are a dead beat dad if you don't pay child support, but you are a creepy stalker if you get your child taken away from you and try to see them? So what do you suggest a person in the position do? Give up and pray that you might be able to get a visit through an open adoption? Well guess what, that doesn't happen. My Husband tried to get an open adoption and he was denied. People make mistakes Gavin, Cody and John were trying to make the best of theirs and do the right thing. If the adoptive parents truly cared about the well being of Emma don't you think they would have given her to her dad when they knew that he wanted her. Don't get me wrong, I am 100% FOR adoption, when both parents are consenting. If I spent my life savings to adopt a child, I would want to make sure that both parents were consenting. They should have gave her back and waited for a child that truly NEEDED adopted. Maybe you should spend a day with John Wyatt before you judge. Maybe you should talk to all of the men who have had their children taken away by the state of Utah. It really is disturbing how people can justify this. Although it may be legal what is going on in Utah, it's wrong.

Posted // September 18,2010 at 18:00 - "Although it may be legal what is going on in Utah, it's wrong." honestly one of these cases needs to make it to federal court or the us supreme court to see if utah's adoption laws actually ARE legal at all.

Posted // September 19,2010 at 22:58 - to Rebecca: "so if someone who wanted a baby kidnapped yours and you didn't find them for a couple of years .... you would just leave the child there to avoid upsetting them?" That was my post and what I said was the CHILD would be traumatized if at 19 months of age she was taken from her home by strangers. And to answer your question...if my child was placed for adoption I would not be fighting 19 months later to take her from the only home and parents she knows and put her through that type of unimaginable horror! Yes, it would be extremely hard, but I'm an adult and she is a baby, I would make that sacrifice because no child deserves to go through that. The flippant post I was addressing was from Anonymous 2 who said Emma would be "fine" with counseling. When my child was young, we had to let him cry himself to sleep a couple of times and it ripped my heart out and he was in his own crib, own home and was put to bed by his parents. Think about Emma, being put to bed in a strange crib, in a strange house by complete strangers. You know she would be crying and probably calling for her momma and daddy. She would be so scared! How can anyone think that is ok? If you're a mom, doesn't it hurt you when your children cry? What if you weren't there to comfort them, what would they go through? This isn't just about who did what when, and it's not just about John Wyatt and what he wants. Based on my experiences as a father, my opinion is that John Wyatt is NOT thinking of Emma, if he were he would do the honorable thing and stop this insane fight. Biological doesn't mean anything to a child, momma & daddy who have always been there, mean everything. If I were his friend, I would ask him to really think about the effect on Emma and ask him if his pride is worth that price. It's possible he's just caught up in all the legal and media drama and isn't thinking clearly, a true friend would help him see Emma's side.

Posted // September 19,2010 at 23:10 - Tanya, First of all, yes I do have children and I love them with all my heart, that's why I would do what is best for them even if it wasn't what I wanted, please see my response to Rebecca regarding what I would do if my child had been adopted and with her adoptive family for 19 months. To address your other question about attacking you & John, I didn't say I had anything to attack either of you about.....I was responding to the first post in this section from anonymous indicating people shouldn't attack John or go after Tanya....that's it. The point I was trying to make is that if people shouldn't do that, they shouldn't attack the adoptive parents either. Geez!!!

Posted // September 20,2010 at 07:42 - Gavin-My son is two months older than Emma. I do think it would be very hard on her to be taken away from her adoptive parents. However, John isn't the one dragging this court case out. John acted in a timely manner and should have never had his daughter taken away in the first place. Like I said before, if I were the adoptive parents I would have waited for a child who truly needed adopted. You say that you would stop fighting if your child was 19 months? So when would it stop? If people don't continue to fight it is going to continue to happen. You don't just give up on your children Gavin. How do we know that these people are good people? We don't. At what age do you stop fighting? People told my Husband to give up, have other children, try and prevent this from happening. So he did. Sad thing is, now it is happening to even more men. How many fathers out there have had there children taken away and didn't have the money to fight it? Just wait til the Ramsey Shaud case comes out and you will see how corrupt Utah really is and just to what extent they will go to steal a baby.

Posted // September 20,2010 at 16:40 - I'm not saying it wouldn't be hard on it, but she's young enough that she can adjust and be fine, and I do think it's in her best interests to be raised by her father and not by people who think it's ok to flee to another jurisdiction to try and keep someone else's child. A short period of upset is worth it if it means the child ends up raised by her rightful father and not unethical people who think it's ok to steal a baby if they want one badly enough.

Posted // September 21,2010 at 21:03 - Rebecca, Rebeckah, Tanya, you are all horribly cruel women. I can't believe you are mothers and honestly think it would be ok to rip a child from the only parents she has ever known. The thought of it and what she would go through makes me heartsick. I know now based on your responses, that you just want to win no matter what it would do to Emma. Tanya, you are just using this case as a soap box to get vengence and get your 15 minutes of fame. you should all be ashamed of yourselves. Don't bother to reply, I have no interest in anything more any of you have to say and I'm not visiting this site again.

Posted // September 22,2010 at 07:25 - @ Gavin-Wow, you really have me figured out. 15 minutes of fame is all I ever wanted out of life. WRONG. I want this madness to stop. I want biological parents to be able to raise their children if they want to. Don't judge me, you don't know me. You don't know what people go through when they have their firstborn child snatched away from them. Vengeance? Duh, in case you didn't read, my Husband's daughter was taken away from him. Don't judge me as a parent, I am not judging you when you say that you'd leave your kid with a kidnapper. The only horribly cruel people in the case are the people who are keeping this baby from her Daddy and the ones who support it

Posted // September 22,2010 at 20:10 - I wonder if Gavin would say that if someone grabbed a newborn baby from the hospital, and they just wanted a baby to raise, weren't abusive to the child, and the kidnapper wasn't found for a couple of years, would he argue that the kidnapper should be allowed to keep the baby because it would too hard on the child otherwise? Even though a law was broken to get the child? It is in the best interests of ALL children if kidnappers aren't allowed to get away with their crimes, and biological parents and their children are kept together whenever possible. If you let someone get away with improperly obtaining a child, you might think you are helping that child by not upsetting them with a transition, but in the long run you are hurting that child by leaving him/her with unethical "parents", and you are hurting countless other parents and children in the future, as people see this behavior rewarded and try to do the same thing by dragging out a court battle as long as possible so they can say "But it would be too hard on the child to move them now!"

Posted // September 22,2010 at 20:57 - Cruel is stealing a man's child because you think you have some "righteous" reason to have it. You don't even consider the real cruelty OR the real perpetuators of "cruel", Gavin. Cruel people steal babies and keep them from their parents -- putting the parents and the child through hell. Don't talk to me about "cruel" -- being raised by people with so little respect for family bonds is the height of cruelty for Emma.

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